Spades and Angels

Anxiety Attack

Lolita

The Next Day

The sun shines brightly down on the woods outside the house when I wake up after the late night and the mysterious stranger that I saw in the bar and then possibly again on the way home. I was still shaken up by it but didn't say a word to anyone, afraid that I'd be called insane. Or even that it was proved right in the light of day. Instead, I avoid looking out of windows like the plague but feel as though whoever it is can still see me. That wriggling feeling inside spreads under my skin until I feel like I'm going insane.

I can't find Mom when I get up and figure she's either gone out somewhere or I'll find her and Ky curled up on the couch again. Either way, I hope she's doing something rather than indulging her addiction and passing out again, the memory of what Luc said about CPS calling ringing in my head enough to have me checking repeatedly that everything looks normal. Or normal enough that any nosy neighbours don't report us. Again.

Luc was also gone when I woke up but I shake that off since he's normally out the most out of the three of us kids, working with dad around the clock on whatever it is they get up to doing. Neither says much and dad's barely around, something that I never questioned as a kid but as I got older was a little suspicious. Especially when I found out from friends that their parents were around a lot more than mine. Hopefully one day they'll tell me since when I was a kid I used to get the line 'You'll know when you come of age.'

Whatever the fuck that means.

Pulling on a pair of dark-washed jeans, a shirt and my signature jacket I pull my hair free of the collar to see a message from my brother on my cell phone waiting for me.

Lucas: About last night, can we meet at the Mount Valley Centre at around 1 pm to talk? Let me know when you're up and if that works for you x

That message was from hours ago and I felt bad I'd been asleep longer than I'd planned to be. Checking, I can see that Ky's still asleep passed out on his front with his hands splayed on the coverlet, face peaceful where I can see a fraction of it turned toward the doorway. Tiptoeing through the house I find Mom still in bed too, eyes closed and looking to be deeply asleep. Careful to disturb either, I check the time to see it's about 11:45, time for me to leave if I'm to meet Luc on time.

Tiptoeing out of mom's room I push hers and Ky's doors closed and snag my keys from the hook by the door, lacing my Doc Martin boots up as I reply.

Lolita: Sorry, just saw the message and am about to leave. M and K are still asleep and I've locked the door behind me. See you in 3o x

He replies a second later with a single kiss but I don't open the message to read it beyond the preview as I'd already locked the door and set off, fishing my earbuds out of the jacket pocket and sticking them in. pressing play on the last song I'd been listening to I start walking when the same feeling of being watched from the other night comes back. Ignoring it for a good ten minutes I keep walking until the feeling washes over me enough that I stop. Needing then to know who or what was watching me.

Looking around I don't see anything out of the ordinary but the feeling never leaves. If anything, when I turned around it, gets stronger until I blink and think I see someone leaning next to a tree. Leaning like they're standing against it for show the shadow looks about six foot two and tall to me from my five-four stature. Blinking I look closer at the tree in question before the shadow vanishes. Just like the other night.

Now more than a little terrified I turned away and keep walking, even with the feeling never leaving me, since I was too afraid to look back again. Almost running to Mount Valley Centre I feel the unsettling sensation disappear when I pass through the sliding glass doors and it drops off behind me. I'd walked with both earbuds in for the duration of the journey but had taken one out when I'd turned to try and find the shadow. But nothing was there, no sounds outside of what I'd expected. People walking, car horns, talking, dogs barking. The normal sounds seemed out of place with the figure who seemed to vanish.