Spades and Angels

This Is Gonna Hurt

Lolita

A Week Later

Going back to school makes me nervous. Not like normal nerves, these were different. Different because I am different now. It sounds cliche even to me, but it's true. I'm not who I used to be.

I couldn't quite believe it the first time Mads told me what Ash said. What his decision was. He had to tell me twice before I believed it. But it made me happier when I did. Despite some of them, like Mad's sister, not being as friendly yet I just tried to keep in mind what Mads said before.

Four Days Earlier

"I'm sure they'll warm up to you eventually Lo, just give them time," Mads calls through to me from wherever he'd vanished. "It'll be like with Ash and the others you met before, just give them time."

"Even your sister? Or is she going to try another bitch showdown and accuse me of ruining your life?" I call back, hearing another few seconds of movement before he comes back, a sorry expression on his face, "sorry, no tact," I mumble, hearing him laugh once, "Hey it's not funny,"

"Kind of is," He offers me that sneaky, devious smile I remember and I sigh, trying to push down the butterflies. "Are you sure you're ready? If not, I can do it later."

I shake my head with a soft smile, "No, I'm ready, I just didn't know it would be you. That's all. Figured it would be one of the others."

"Why's that?" he takes my right wrist gently and I sigh, "Figured I looked too young, that it Alcaraz? Never thought I'd hear the age card from you of all people,"

"What...what's that supposed to mean," I reply as he finishes whatever prep work he'd been doing and starts with creating the tattoo design on my skin. My body tensed once as the unfamiliar prickling pushed through. However the more he does it, the more I slowly relax. Used to the sensation from doing so twice before, Distracting myself by returning to our previous conversation. "What do you mean you didn't think you'd hear the age card from me of all people? What do you mean, me of all people?"

Mads doesn't look up from where he's concentrating but I see the slight smile, the momentary quirk of his lips before his expression settles back into the concentration as he carries on with what he'd been doing. My breath caught once, "You ok? Tell me if it hurts."

"I'm ok, just not used to this. Since the Spades did it differently," I shivered mentally. Remember for mine how I was forced to sit as they tied my arm down and did it a lot more painfully. The second time around especially. Sensing Mads watching me I sigh, "I'm fine, I promise."

He sighs, "Ok, I'm nearly done anyway," I laugh, not sure where it came from but it felt good. Good to finally laugh, "Can...can I ask you something?" Mad's voice is softer the second time he speaks and I frown, not sure where he's going. "Lo?"

"Sure," I frown, giving him a look when he finishes what he'd been doing and sitting up a little so his eyes meet mine, "Mads what...what is it?" I ask softly, reaching across to tap his arm. "You look, nervous I guess."

"I wanted to ask you something but now's not the time," He replies, finishing with what he'd been doing checking over the tattoo before releasing my arm. When he does so I use my thumb to wipe away any small spots of blood to reveal where the new cardinal red angel wings tattoo shines there like a promise. A promise of hope.

Of a family.

Present Day

Mads never elaborated on the cryptic question he asked the day he gave me my Angels tattoo and thanks to fate never got the chance. Not before school started at least and then it got harder. We kept up the whole kidnap cover story but I knew I'd have to face them when I went back.