My dove

Top marks| H&C

*Authors note~ I tend to write from experience and as a high achiever I often deal with feeling this way. It helps to reach out and remember you deserve the love and care no matter what*

Trigger warning ~

Prompt ~ tumblr anon ~ Hi can I ask for a hurt/comfort fic where r is just really stressed from being a high achiever and they're beating themselves up for not getting a good grade and subsequently not eating/sleeping/being harsh on themself because they don't 'deserve it' so lady lesso gives them a pep talk and stays w them for a while to make sure they actually take care of themself? Thank you, needed this personally for something that happened today <3
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Grades are important. You knew that. You had it drummed into you since you were old enough to even understand what a test was. You had to be the best. And if you weren't the best then you had to work harder. Failure is not an option. Your parents would only be proud of you were the best of the best. Full marks, not a mark below of you seemed to lose your worth. Knowing this is how they felt, meant you always put an unnecessary amount of stress on yourself even at an early age.

That's why when you failed, well you didn't fail exactly you got ninety nine percent, you were absolutely crushed. You had failed. Your utterly perfect record tarnished. And all you could do is blame yourself. You let yourself and your parents down, which meant you deserved to be punished. After all that's what your mother would do. She wasn't here to do it so you had to be strong to do it to yourself. Immediately you began to try and formulate a new studying routine. Adding in even more hours into your already hectic schedule.

Ever since the results of that test, you had spent every last waking moment with your head buried in a book. You tried many different methods of retaining information yet nothing seemed to work. Adding to your frustration, all you could do was cram more. You began to cut out meals and even staying up into the early hours of the morning and waking up at five in the morning every day. You were hardly managing to get about three hours of sleep a night.

Weight began to fall from your already small frame. Your focus deteriorated with each passing day. You had even slipped back into old habits as a form of punishing yourself for failing. The pressure you placed on yourself holding a massive cloud of grief over your heart. Truthfully you wanted help, to be free from the enormous burden but you didn't know how to get the help. Anyone you had previously attempted to tell had completely agreed with your parents, reassuring that they were going to be creating a strong and reliable leader for the realm. Didn't matter if you wanted to rule or not, they were conditioning you to be their perfect puppet.

You were confused with Lady Leonora Lesso had requested your presence in her office with immediate effect. As far as you knew, you had done nothing wrong to warrant a visit to her office. In fact you had kept yourself to yourself so much so that you couldn't even be an accomplice to anyone else's actions. As soon as your classes were done for the day you made your way to her office riddled with anxiety. Maybe this was about the grade? Was she mad at you for failing too? Oh god were you about to be dragged to the Doom Room?

With trembling hands you knocked on her office door, waiting until she granted you permission to enter. You did so nervously and locked the door as she had requested you do. Lesso gestured to the chair in front of her desk indicating she wanted you to sit. You sat, hands folded neatly in your lap and your eyes showing the fear you were feeling run rampant within.

"Little one? Are you okay" she queried in a soft tone, making you do a double take. Was she being nice? That was odd. "I'm okay thank you Lesso I just have studying to do" you murmured hoping that she would let you leave. Unfortunately for you all that did was cause a frown to form on her lips. "That's why you're here darling. "You're overwhelming and overworking yourself too much" she stated as a matter of fact causing tears to spring into your eyes. How could that be true when you still failed. Yes it's one mark. But it is one mark off being perfect. As you should be.

Noticing you're teary state the older woman stood and came to kneel in front of you. Her pads of her thumb coming to write the stray tears now falling. "Oh little one, I know. It's just one mark my darling honestly it's not the end of the world" she murmured to you making sure to wipe every stray tear. It always amazed you how she seemed to know exactly what was wrong. You couldn't help but break down and fling yourself into her arms. It took a few minutes for  Lesso to respond, bringing her hands to stroke comforting patterns over your back. "Hush little one it's okay. You're still amazing. It's just one mark, it was a really hard test love. You should be so proud of yourself"

You allowed yourself to soak in her words and her soothing embrace. This was the motherly affection you'd craved for years and never found. Yet here in her arms you felt as though you were a small child becoming comforted by their mother after falling down. "Thank you momma" you whispered into her shoulder feeling her immediately relax at the word "momma." "You're so welcome my little dove, now I want you to get something to eat for me and some sleep tonight hmm?" And you nodded but held on to the woman tighter not ready to lose the contact just yet. Your silent question being answered when she held you closer to her body and told you to just rest for a little bit.

Word count ~ 1047