Jealousy, Jealousy || Jegulus & Rosekiller

24. Engraving

Regulus

Regulus is examining the old wood of the desk he's sitting on. There is a scratch, someone started to engrave a heart and then must have changed his mind.

"What wasn't a lie?", asks James, almost a whisper. Regulus feels his eyes on him.

Regulus traces the shape with his finger, it's not sharp, many people before him must have done the same. Half a heart. A promise of love or a promise of loss?

"Reg", James' voice is pleading.

"Did you mean it when you said that you like that I'm kind?"

Regulus nods.

"That you like that I never leave you alone?"

His voice doesn't want to come out, but could he forgive himself if he didn't answer?

"I don't mind it", his voice revealing how painful it is to admit it.

"That you like that I'm curious about you?"

His finger stops in the middle of the heart. He can't answer this.

"That I'm beautiful?", continues James.

"James". Regulus looks at him pleading him with his eyes. He doesn't even know what he's pleading for anymore. Pease stop. Please continue.

"That I'm interesting?", James is looking straight into his eyes.

"Because I think you are, Reg", James continues. "You're the most interesting person I know. You're smart and curious, and talented, and so passionate. It's a sight to witness you fly, or talk about your books, sing your favourite songs, tell the stars' stories. You go in depth in everything you do.

The more I know you the more I feel there is to know.

And you're full of contradictions. What can be seen at first glance and that is below the surface. The outside and the inside. Sharp and soft at the same time.

I love your sweet side, even though you hide it, and I wish you wouldn't because it's beautiful. And you're caring, or at least every time you've comforted me, I felt like you cared about me, but I don't know if I imagined it, you guard yourself so much, it's hard to tell sometimes-"

"You haven't. Imagined it", his voice a little more than a whisper.

James' eyes widen, searching, inquiring into Regulus'.

He walks towards him and gets closer and closer. Regulus can't take his eyes away. James stops when he's inches from him.

He cradles Regulus' cheek with his hand. "I haven't...", he whispers.

Regulus closes his eyes and relies on James' hand, basking in his touch.

He puts his hands on James' waist, glides over his hand and rests his forehead on James' chest. He feels James' hands immersed in his hair.

Regulus breathes deeply. Pines and broom polish. He doesn't need to brew Amortentia to know it would smell like James.

He raises his head and looks in James' eyes, they are looking at him like he's the most wonderful thing in the world.

He pulls James closer. James cradles his cheeks and closes the distance between them, bringing him into a kiss.

Regulus feels like up to that moment he was underwater, everything was distant and dim, and only now he's reached the surface and finally breathing.

James is so gentle.

They kiss slowly, taking their time, gradually discovering each other.

All thoughts have disappeared from his mind. There is only James. He takes up all the space. James' waist under his hands, James' touch on his face, James' lips on his, so soft.