Safe With You

Talks and New Years

Here is what you guys have been waiting for!

POV JJ

"Oh god... We were supposed to be talking baby" Ash giggles resting her head on my chest. I breathe out a laugh wrapping my arms around her kissing her head. "What we just did was not my fault, baby" I say smirking making her huff a laugh out and roll over onto her back. I turn my body to face her, her mirroring my position. "We need to talk Jay" Ash says stroking my arm. I sigh and nod scooting a bit closer brushing a stray hair out of her face. "Are we talking now or do you want to clean up and talk on the couch?" I ask her smiling softly. "Couch, but food first after we clean up" Ash says making me nod and kiss her gently on the lips. "Maybe...After...Another round" She mumbles between kisses making me smirk and push her onto her back making us laugh. "You're supposed to be the task oriented one" I say kissing down her neck. "Mmm, it's the OCD in me can't stop now" she moans making me smirk and suck a mark on her collar bone. "You got it dude" I mumble making her let a laugh out and slap my shoulder. "Fuck you. Now fuck me" she gasps making me chuckle and kiss down her body.

"So where  do you want to start?" I ask after about 3 hours later. We are now on the couch sat next to each other after cleaning up and eating. "How about at the obvious question. It will initiate convernsation. It's actually a way... Ok, let's just start with the question" I mumble at the end making Ash giggle. "You know I love it when you talk all FBI profiler" she says leaning in kissing me. I wrap my arm around her waist and the other tilts her chin deepening the kiss making both of us moan. She grabs my shoulders and swings her leg over my lap straddling me. "You're a bad infulence" I mumble against her lips making her smirk and bite my lower lip causing me to moan. "We need to talk, love" I try again making her huff and lean back. "I know... I'm just scared if we do this, what we have. It will be broken" she says softly looking at her hands that play with my shirt. "Hey, look at me Ash" I say tilting my head down to catch her gaze. "We'll be ok. We just need to talk and make sure we are both on the same page" I say taking her hand in my own. She smiles and nods leaning in to kiss me before getting off my lap sitting next to me. "Ok, so... Do you want to have kids?" She asks me making me sigh. "Yes. I do. I would like to have them with you" I say looking at her. She sucks in a breath and nods looking down at her hands. "Jay, I... I don't want to carry, I don't want to be pregnant again" She says looking up at me with tears in her eyes. I smile gently at her and scoot closer to her. "That's ok. You don't have to and I wouldn't force you too. But that's not the question my love. Do you want children?" I ask her making her furrow her brows. "I...

POV Ash

Do I want children? Will I be a good mother? I never really thought about but I know I want to do everything with Jay. I can see my life with her and I hope her to be the last person I am with. Both my sisters are mothers... Well both are stepmothers but it doesn't matter how, they both are and so happy. I feel kind of left behind. I'm known as the strict, bossy the no fun sister. With Jay I feel relaxed and safe. More safe than I have ever felt in any relationship. She makes me want to let loose and do things I wouldn't consider doing. It's been barely over a year and I am already so dependant on her. It's scary and I don't know if it's too soon to talk about kids. But I know we need to since we are planning our whole life together. I mean we are talking about marriage. "I... Do. I would love to me a mother. I see my sisters so happy with their kids and I want that. I want that with you" I say making her smile at me. "You would be a great mother. There are other ways to have children you know" she says smirking making me roll my eyes. "I know that but I didn't know if you wanted me to carry" I say. "Men haven't been kind to you, have they?" She asks making me look at her confused. "You look for reassurance at time when you have no reason to." She says making me look down. Do I? I know I worry about upsetting her or doing something wrong, even though I know there is no reason to with her. "I'm sorry. I don't mean too" I say looking at her. "Ashley, my love. Don't apologize for someone making you feel this way. You did nothing wrong." She says and I nod smiling a bit at her. "I don't know why I do it. It's a a reflex but I've gotten better at it and I don't want you to think I think of you like I do my ex." I say and she nods pulling me into her side making me melt into her relaxing. "I love you and I have seen you grow right in front of my eyes. You are amazing and so strong" she says making me look up at her smiling. "I love you" I say pouting my lip making her laugh and lean done to kiss me. "I don't know if I want a baby" she says making her frown. "What? I though you said you wanted children" I ask confused and sitting up a bit. "No, Yes I do want kids. I just don't think a baby would work for us. I would like to adpot. Maybe 8-16 depending on who catches our hearts" she says making me smile at her. "I agree. Your job is dangerous and unpredictable. My job is expanding and has rushes during peak seasons. It would be hard to have a child that needed our constant care" I share making her nod in agreement. "I agree and to be clear I don't mean right now. Kids that is. I just wanted to make sure we're on the same page before we started our lives together." She says making me smile. "I agree. I say we just play it by ear and when it feels right we'll do it. And if further down the road we decide we want a baby, adopted or not, we can discuse it" I say and she nods pulling me back into her. "We make a great team... When we communicate" She teases making me giggle and lean into her side. "Communication is key" I say making her laugh. "So... Now that we talked and are on the same page..." she trails off looking at me. A smile creeps up on my face and I jump onto Jay making her fall back onto the couch. We both laugh and she brushes the hair out of my face that got in the way. "I love you" she says making me smile. "I love you too" I say and kiss her roughly needing her.