Observation - Cillian Murphy

Obnoxious

Silence spoke volumes between us. The idea of a dinner 'date' gradually used up and morphed into something more problematic. I didn't quite understand the strong feelings of despise Cillian manifested onto me, nor the reason behind them. All I wanted was to sneak out of that restaurant, flop back onto my soft bed and read a new book I'd gotten recently.

In some way, I appreciated the silence between us as I wanted to analyse Cillian and his behavior while finding it incredibly annoying. He didn't want to communicate, not because he was busy eating blue cheese, but because it was me . I was (somehow) a barrier to his conscience, and I liked it.

As if reading my mind, Cillian glanced up at me directly. He paused to look back at his plate, stabbing a piece of tart on his fork.

"Have you been to Amsterdam before?" Cillian wondered.

"No," I paused. "Not really ... Have you?"

Cillian nodded while chewing his portion of food. "I've been here with my ex-wife a couple of times. She liked the architecture of this city." He spoke after swallowing the tiny piece of tart.

I sipped a bit of my water while smiling. Cillian must have noticed I was surprised. To make it up, he stopped speaking at all. His ocean eyes, on the contrary, communicated various messages. Cillian was mysterious yet intriguing but also monotonous and irritating.

"Are you surprised?" He suddenly spoke up.

"Kind of, even though you never talk about yourself." I pointed out, bringing a glass of water to my soft lips.

"Well," Cillian sighed. "I prefer to live a private life."

I looked into his occult gaze as a tiny strand of Cillian's chocolate hair fell over his eye.

"I like to keep my circle small and enjoy my own company. I think just doing things myself and not needing validation from anyone is exciting ." Cillian expressed.

I nodded, relating to his words. "Most of the time, I'm alone, like fully," I paused, catching my breath. "And you know— I read, spend some time by myself, all things like that. Whenever I have to interact with someone, I often seem shy or arrogant, no in between. But learning to enjoy my own company has been so golden to me." I smiled, voicing my thoughts.

"My wife used to say I spent too much time in my head, forgetting about the world around me," Cillian revealed.

I chuckled. "No wonder you're divorced."

Cillian's steely gaze returned immediately. "You're so," he paused, trying to find an appropriate word.

"Remarkable?" I grinned at Cillian.

Cillian chuckled. "Obnoxious."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, please!"

Until the end of our dinner, I was too much on my guard to Cillian's questions. Perhaps, hearing me scramble for answers made him suspect there was more amiss than sincerity in the character I was showing.

We stood in the middle of the hotel lobby. Various people recognised Cillian, eventually circling him to take pictures and autographs.

Not waiting further, I walked towards the exit of the building, passing by a large willow teddy bear.

"Where are you going?" Cillian turned around, following me.

"Outside," I answered.

The wind was flowing delicately, feeling a little chilly on the skin. I watched the car disappear around the corner, revealing the darkening sky above.

I reached for my raven purse to grab a thin paper tube. Pressing it through my gentle lips, I lit the cigarette, instantly exhaling it.

The smoke gradually dragged into the sparkling darkness, dissolving there eventually.

Once inhaling the cigarette again, a naked new moon brushed through my eye, gently revealing itself across the sky.

"Get that poison out of your mouth," Cillian demanded.

I sucked on my cigarette and looked at him with a frigid gaze. He, in return, did not seem to be happy.

Our conversation turned into a sudden halt. I blew a light puff of smoke into Cillian's face before stepping back into the building, my skirt softly ruffling against the chilly wind.

"Is this it?" I heard him shout. Turning back, I looked at Cillian, hands in his pockets, silently watching me. His silhouette was dimmed down by lights, making him look intimidating.

I smiled at him before opening the hotel doors and walking off, immense light surrounding me.