Accidental Sins

Guilt

Sukuna had more faith in the drugs than he should've because you were starting to wake up. Your mind was so groggy that you weren't sure if you were dreaming or not. You squirmed in his rough grasp.

He couldn't bring himself to stop now that he had you. He just wanted a little bit more.

You whined again, and Sukuna moved his gaze up to your face.

He froze. His chest pinged achingly. Your beautiful features were contorted into discomfort and fear. Still half-asleep, and so unsure of what was happening.

Sukuna had a moment of clarity. What was he doing to you? How could he do this to you?

He's done far worse to many women in the past, so why should he feel any different about doing it to you?

He tried to tell himself this was no different, but it was. He thought of how disgusted you'd be by his actions. He knows you don't like being touched by him. He hastily pulled his hands away from you and tried to put some distance between the two of you.

He hated knowing he was no better than Hiroshi. He made such an effort to keep Hiroshi from hurting you yet here he was, doing the very thing he sought to stop.

Sukuna reached forward and slid your shorts up, as well as laying a light blanket over you.

For once in his life, he felt guilty. It was a foreign emotion, one he wasn't much familiar with. He moved off the bed completely and sank to the floor. Running his hands over his face. All those nights of snaking his hands over your body seemed so wrong. He had violated you, and he hated himself for it.

Just as his ego had risen from his victory, it fell. It fell hard. Sukuna's heart was practically underground with how heavy it felt. He couldn't bare this anymore. He couldn't bare the knowledge that he was the one intruding on your body. He called you a whore so many times yet look what he's done.

Sukuna sat on the floor for the rest of the night, watching your body slowly rise and fall with your breaths.

He was scared to go near you know. He couldn't really say what came over him. Perhaps since his patience had been so thin from the date with Satoru he just snapped.

No, there was no excuse for touching you like that. He knew that, and yet he doubted he'd ever reveal to you what he had done.

~

The following morning you were feeling better but still a bit sick. The heat had subsided and you no longer felt nauseous. Instead, you just felt under the weather.

Your eyes fluttered open in the dim light that peeped past your curtains. As you began to stir, Sukuna perked up. He shifted in his position slightly but remained seated.

You rubbed your eyes and sat up, stretching your arms over your head.

It registered that Sukuna was not beside you, and for a brief moment, you panicked.

Though the panic was short-lived as you scanned your room and saw him, "Why are you over there?" Your tired voice sounded so cute to him.

Sukuna had spent all night thinking about the guilty feeling, and he hadn't thought of what he'd say to you in the morning. You yawned, not really concerned about whatever Sukuna's answer would be.

Sukuna remained quiet as you began going about your morning routine. You were dragging your feet seeing as you still felt tired.

The only difference today was that when you took a shower and changed, Sukuna turned around voluntarily.

He was simply too disgusted with himself to look at you like that.

You didn't really notice his actions, your mind was preoccupied with other things. You took some medicine that you thought might help, then went on to make yourself breakfast.

Bacon sizzled in the pan before you, the TV playing in the background.

Sukuna leaned on the counter a few feet away from you.

"I might call off work today, I still don't feel very good," You murmured half-mindedly.

Sukuna nodded, "That might be best." You furrowed your brows, a little confused at the lack of a snarky reply. You shook the feeling off.

You picked up your phone from beside you and saw Satoru had texted you last night and again this morning.

Satoru - Good night angel, I had fun today :)

Satoru - Good morning! I hope you slept well <3

You couldn't help but smile at the message, then Hiroshi's words rang in your mind.

Sounds to me like this Satoru guy is just too much for you. You should be comfortable with the person you're dating. It doesn't sound like you're very comfortable with Satoru.

You bit your lip, "Sukuna, do you think Hiroshi is right about Satoru?"

Sukuna tensed at the mention of your pervy neighbor. He glanced at the cookie tin that still lay on your counter.

If he's being honest with himself, he'd rather see you with Satoru than Hiroshi. Granted he'd rather you be with neither but he needs to keep you away from Hiroshi first.

"Your neighbor is nothing more than a low-life rat. Don't listen to a word he says," Sukuna thought about telling you about Hiroshi, but he felt you wouldn't believe him. Your trust in Sukuna is practically nonexistent.

"You think that about everybody," You mumbled. Sukuna grabbed the cookie tin off the counter and pulled the lid off. You looked at him questionably. "Hey, what- Sukuna! What the hell?!"

Sukuna dumped the tin into the trash, and tossed the empty container onto the marble, "They're bad for your health."

"Since when did you care about my health?" You defeatedly looked at the empty tin. "Don't you want me to die soon so you can be free or something?" Sukuna didn't have anything to say, so he just stared with a bored glare. You turned back to the stove, seeing as he wasn't going to give you any answers.

You finished cooking and pulled down two plates. This piqued Sukuna's attention, and he eagerly peered at your busy hands.

You fixed up two servings and moved to the dining table. You set one down beside you and started eating.

After a second you swallowed and looked up to Sukuna, gesturing at the plate, "Come on, eat. I made extra for you."

Sukuna's glare softened and he hesitated before sitting next to you. He waited for you to continue eating before he moved to eat as well.

He took one bite and melted. The food was heavenly. It might've just been that you were the one to make it, but he absolutely adored the meal.

He savored the food just as he had done the night before.

Sukuna peered over at you as he ate. You looked so calm and relaxed. You looked so peaceful and happy. Content.

If you knew what he had done, you wouldn't look so content.

He craved that small talk with you again, but he wasn't sure how to go about it. Instead, he just remained quiet and moved his focus back onto his plate.