Confessions of an Intern

Week Thirty-seven

My first week of human behavior was anticlimactic, except for the fact I only worked half days, got to sleep and spend loads of time with my kids. This is exactly what I need after the last several months of hellacious hours. I did get some education in though. It seems I am again uniquely qualified. I have several years of nursing experience behind me where I have learned much about psychological aspects of human beings. I was able to intelligently discuss the topics my faculty presented, and that was before I did any reading.

I even made her cry with one of my examples. This is not meant to be a month of one on one therapy for me by this psychologist I am working with, but regardless, it will still be therapeutic. One topic we discussed this week was the physician-patient relationship. After hearing one of her personal examples, we talked about what it meant to me. I feel that in order to have a good, working, therapeutic realtionship, we need to be able to see each other as human beings. Patients are not a sum total of their disease. They are human beings with disease, or illness, or conditions, pick your name. The effect of the disease on their lab work is not the only thing to take into consideration when treating your patient. While evidence based medicine dictates that "if x, then y", if this is the only approach you take with your unique patients, you will lose patients quickly. Each person needs to be treated individually, while following the recommendations that are considered 'best practice'. These are guidelines, not hard and fast rules. However, if government gets their way, I will only be paid if I follow these guidelines to the 't'.

I got a fresh dose of reality when I called my primary care doc's new office and when I asked to schedule an appointment, I was asked what insurance I have. I told them and was chagrined to hear that the new office does not take my insurance. I have been with this same doctor for fifteen years! I love him like a family member, and I've known him nearly as long as my husband! Once I hung up, I cried harder over this loss than I did over my grandmother. I would say to hell with it and pay out of pocket, but we are not currently in a position to do so. We pay so much in premiums and I am on some medication, so I need the insurance. It just means I have to go develop an intimate relationship again with a perfect stranger...I don't like it.

Again, I believe everything happens for a reason, and I will be again reminded what it is like to meet a new doctor from a patient's perspective. Here goes nothin'.