May we always meet again

Chapter 18

Clarke's POV

After this somewhat strange ladies night, Lexa and I still messaged each other and saw each other from time to time, but my focus was clearly on Luna. The more I saw her, the more important she became to me. She had become an integral part of my life and I enjoyed spending time with her. The butterflies inside me slowly became more and more active and I knew that this was a good sign to take the next step. And yet I still missed Lexa. Which meant for me that I was not yet as far as I wanted to be. That and the fact that the black box with my mother's ring was still in my nightstand drawer along with the note.

First I had to come to terms with it all in order to really start something new, and the easiest way was for Lexa and Luna to meet. It wasn't about comparing these two women, but I wanted to build something real with Luna, so it made sense to confront myself with something real. Because I was still looking at Lexa with the eyes from that disastrous morning I woke up without her, and that wasn't doing me or my almost relationship any good. But how could I start something new when something was holding me to the old? Oh shit.

***

When I told Luna about my idea she was excited to meet someone from my life, because until now I hadn't been ready to include her in that part too. It wasn't fair, but I knew what it would mean. My family would understand even less than Raven. They loved Lexa and saw us down the aisle, they'd made that abundantly clear, and it had been hard enough so far to explain to them why we weren't coming over for dinner again. How hard would everything else be then?

"Clarke?"

"Hmm?" questioningly I looked at Luna, who started laughing.

"Where were you just now? I must have asked you the same question three times." She was still grinning and looking at me mischievously.

"I was in thought, sorry. I'm with you now, though." I looked at her questioningly as Luna put an arm around me and hugged me to her.

"I noticed that. I actually just wanted to know how you and Lexa knew each other." Almost imperceptibly I stiffened, but of course it didn't escape her notice and she raised her eyebrows critically. Very good Clarke. Why don't you make it more noticeable? You might as well tell her the whole story, it's not much more revealing....

Deeply I swallowed, of course I had expected the question and still it hit me. So I stuck as close to *our* truth as I could. "I treated her. It was just a broken arm, it was patched up quickly. Somehow we hit it off, and when she was able to get the Gibs off, she asked me for my number. That's how our friendship started." I didn't like lying to her, but the confidentiality clause forbade it and yes, I was aware that it was a convenient excuse besides.

"Is she bringing someone to the meeting?" Did I hear something like jealousy? Kind of sweet.

Hastily, I gave her a kiss. "I don't know, but I suspect so. It'll be a double date then." I smiled at her. "I haven't even asked her yet. I wanted to know your opinion first, but I'll text her right after."

After a quick note to Lexa telling her exactly what I had told Luna about our getting to know each other and asking for a meeting, which she agreed to, it took place a few days later.

Now I could only hope that none of our dates knew anyone from our old class, or I would have a problem. Well, more than one. Accordingly, my nerves were fluttering, although the plan was to comfortably drink something, which was not really nerve-wracking.

Maybe it was also due to the fact that Lexa brought Ontari and I brought Luna. It was something new and I didn't know if everything fit or maybe it was even strange. What if the mood would be tense?