We all use bones everyday

Are you my mummy?

It was night time. Angela and Brennen were still at the museum she was holding a coat in her hand while Brennen was still at the desk in her office working away. Angela was upset about not leaving to go to the club and if they didn't go now they couldn't get in. Farrah is waiting for us. She was reluctant as well. But Brennen kept coming up with excuses after another why she couldn't go. About a case about a student about her book. Said her inbox was full but we knew that wasn't true she said that there was a T.V. show that needed to be researched but if she doesn't know pop culture references she might as well be Castiel. We all know she doesn't need to do that. Once they take their lab coats off and get Brennen dressed into something more appropriate for a club Brennen didn't realize I (outfit 9) was waiting for them in the limo that Jason sent. Which is partly the reason I'm even here myself Jason made me do it more like convinced but I didn't want to go.

Just before this.... I was on the phone with Angela it was after work and I'd been sitting on the couch with Layla in my pjs watching a movie with popcorn between the two of us after having poured in mnms and used lots of movie theatre popcorn and we were now sitting on the couch in our private movie theatre room because apparently it has that. I was just telling Angela I wasn't sure if I wanted to go that I can't remember the last time I left Layla at home at night. That she would go with us to concerts and come with us to cafe's and go everywhere with us because I was so worried to leave her alone or anyone that wasn't me Jason or the band. I'd been warry of the idea of having all of these bodyguards at the house or at their side house because I didn't like them in the house or having a nanny or a personal chef. That's how kids got spoiled and entitled. And not to sound like one of those parents but my daughter is perfect and everyone says so. I didn't want her to be one of those kids that acts bratty and acts up because their parents are rich and famous show they love them with gifts but are never home and never around because they have work to do. So they leave them in the hands of the "help."

I also didn't want everything given to me on silver spoon. It's not how I grew up not that I had much of a childhood anyways if one at all. I wanted to work hard for what I had I wanted to have a job and provide for me and my daughter. Which Jason has told me there was nothing wrong with me feeling this way and when I think I feel like I'm a bad mother he and Layla and Lauren and Angel and Lance they all tell me again and again that I am a great mother. But I feel it's hard to compare myself to anything when we didn't have role model parents to look up to Seeley more or less raised me. And of course we had grandpa Hank. But I hadn't even known I was with child when Layla came along. The school people questioned me on everything but doted on Jason. Everyone thinks we would make a cute couple and be a cute little family and I love Jason to pieces but why can't I just be a single mother? I'm single not alone. I've had Jason I've had Lance I've had the girls and now my brother and long distance moral emotional support from Hank. But our father was abusive and our mother left us.

I don't have strong women role models in my life. At least not with kids of their own. I was the same age as my band members we were practically sisters just like me and Lauren are. Had it not been for the miracle that got me out of my hometown out of a bad situation whether my best friend was mad at me or not she sent him that recording. She wanted me to get out of here. If not for that I would've insisted on raising my child on my own probably to prove a point. Everyone was mad at me anyways by that point when I went to that party. Not that it didn't all go away when my brothers arrived at said party. But everyone left me. Except grandpa not that I wanted to see anyone I was depressed and eating all the time and making myself sick. I felt disgusting. I had no role models in my life period. Except maybe grandpa Hank. My brothers were always in some kind trouble. And then Seeley went and served. If I had never had gone never had Jason's support after the baby came I would've been in a dark place not that I wasn't already but she was what drew me out of that dark place. I didn't know it before it was too late but I was with child. And giving her up for adoption was never going to be a choice.