Bird Wings

Chapter 14

It was a long time before Wren stood again and looked around her. Her eyes were puffy now from crying, making her surroundings look blurry and undefined. There was something unbelievable about this place; the familiarity of it all was messing with her mind. She had had time to adjust herself to new things, really for the first time in her life, and now she was just... back? Once again under the canopy of trees, once again hearing the soft rustle of their leaves overhead, but being here was not comforting in the way familiar things should be. Wren found herself turning in a slow circle, still feeling slight hiccuping sobs, searching for anything to look at that didn't feel wrong.

The grass in the meadow had become dull in the summer sun, its colour faded and details blurred. It was the time of year where everything began to look rather limp and sad. The light that filtered through the leaves didn't add any life to the things it touched, giving Wren the impression that she couldn't see them clearly. Despite being surrounded by nature, she couldn't find anything that held any vitality. Were those trees really alive? Was the grass growing? It all felt like some kind of veneer, a set like a room in a doll's house, a fabricated cage made to look real.

Next she made herself look up. While she had cried or focused on the space below the trees, she could pretend that the sky above her was not empty. Hawk had often disappeared for periods of time, especially when he was upset. Perhaps he had worked through whatever it was that made him want to abandon her and was coming back. She had the hope that being alone in the world again would force him to wake up and see that he still needed her.

The patch of sky visible from the meadow was pitiful in comparison to the whole expanse of it she had been able to see from up there on the cliff. This was the biggest clearing anywhere near the village; she had used to come out here at night with her friends to look at the stars together. Would she never actually see the sky again?

Hawk was gone. Long, long gone. Regardless of how abruptly his decision had been made, he was sticking to it. He could even be on the run again, like all those years before. Hadn't he said once that he couldn't stand to stay somewhere after the people had really seen him? Was her village now just another place he could never return to?

That direction of thoughts led to pain, and more tears. She winced inwardly as a whole wave of sharp, disconnected memories hit her. Everything she had learned about Hawk, the struggles in his past, the way he talked and the few times he'd laughed. That last kiss on her lips and all the uncertain worry she now had about his future. All of this had to be packed away if she wanted to keep her reason.

Avoiding painful thoughts always pushed Wren into action. With a gasp she spun around to face the village and took several fast steps off the mound and towards home. The momentum carried her to the edge of the clearing where a trodden dirt path began, and there she stopped. Just for a moment, she told herself. Just to take another breath. It was time to start thinking of her family, and to feel grateful that at least they would know she was alive - but for one last second she would allow herself to think only of Hawk. Wren tilted her head back, fighting the urge to turn and search the sky again, intent on finding peace in the still calm of her surroundings. The air smelled of familiar woodsy things like tree bark and cool earth; she drew in a deep breath through her nose and out again in a long sigh. Then she squared her shoulders and took her first real step back towards home.

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This is the beginning of part two: New Eyes

If you've made it this far please know that I'd give you a Tim Horton's gift card & my first born child out of gratitude if I could. ❤️

-Laura