Butterfly Effect

19: Baby Deluca-Bishop is...

Maya's Pov

That afternoon we were at the station, ready to tell my friends that Carina was pregnant. I was actually pretty nervous about it, because for them we stopped trying after my accident on the treadmill and my diagnosis, and then we just took Hailee in with us.
I didn't know why, I even knew that I shouldn't be afraid of my family's reaction, but I was still terrified.
"Hi Carina, hi Mini-Bishop" Vic said as they walked into the beanery.
I turned around to look at my daughter running happily in my direction, followed by Carina that was smiling widely.
"Hi guys" Lia smiled, sitting next to me at the dining table. She looked like her morning at school wasn't bad, like she was just another normal teenager and not the girl that has already been through hell. She was more open with people now, and she actually felt comfortable with the team.
"I'm sorry to disturb, but why are the two best Deluca-Bishops here?" Travis asked and I rolled my eyes at him with a smile. I loved how much they liked my family. It made me feel like I was really part of the team, and for a long time I hadn't felt like that...
"I have to leave for an important personal matter, so Andy will be in charge this afternoon while I'm out" I said, smiling at my beautiful wife.
"So, you have to leave mid shift but you are smiling... What the hell do you have to do?" Vic asked and I looked at my wife, asking her permission to share the wonderful news with them. When she nodded slightly, I knew that these were the last moments where our secret would be only ours.
"Carina has an appointment to see Jo Wilson" I said, and everyone stopped in their place. Silence filled the room...
"Wait cap, Jo Wilson is an ob" Travis stated, realizing in that moment what I was trying to say "OH MY GOD!".
"Yes, Jo is an ob" I responded, taking a deep breath and smiling at my wife and at my daughter "Carina's pregnant".
The room exploded with cheers and laughs. There wasn't a face without a smile of happiness, and every single member of my team said their congratulations to Carina.
"I'm glad for your happiness, seriously, your support means a lot to us, but if we don't want to leave Jo there waiting for us, we should go now" Carina said and my family and I left the room with another round of congratulations coming from my team.
We got out of the station with bright smiles, and we walked together to Carina's car, ready and a bit nervous for this appointment. Thanks to Lia, I had discovered that I'm not like my father at all, but sometimes that fear was still there, buried under the surface, waiting for the moment to come back and install doubts inside of my brain...

Hailee's Pov

During the drive to the hospital, I could definitely tell that my mom was really anxious, but I couldn't really figure out why... I mean, I knew that this was all new to her, but I thought that being married to a gynecologist would give her enough reassurance.
When we arrived at the hospital and a nurse took us into a small examination room where Jo was waiting for us, I could see that every muscle in her body was tense, so I walked toward her and I grabbed her hand in mine.
"Are you okay, mom?" I asked calmly.
"I'm a little nervous, but I'm okay... I just want your mamma and your sibling to be healthy" she said in response and Jo smiled at her, preparing everything for the exam.
Carina raised her shirt up and Jo turned the screen away from her eyes, knowing that my mamma would understand everything with just a look.
"I usually don't hide the screen to my patients, but I don't know if you guys want to know the gender and Carina would recognize it immediately" Jo giggled, trying to make Maya relax.
"We would like to find out" my moms answered at the same time, making me smile in my seat. They were always so in sync...
"Okay, I have an idea... Hailee, can you help me with something?" she said and I walked to her under the confused gazes of my moms, stopping right in front of the screen.
Seeing it made everything more real... I was seriously going to have a sibling...
Jo whispered what I had to do in my ear, and I nodded my head as a sign of understanding.
"So Jo, what are we having?" my mamma asked, grabbing Maya's hand while she was looking with wonder in her eyes at me.
"Well moms... It looks like we're not going to be all girls anymore" I said as Jo turned the screen toward them.
"It's a boy?" Maya asked with tears of joy in her icy blue eyes. Seeing my mom like that got me wondering about my birth mother and her reaction when she'd found out I was a girl. "Yes Maya, a beautiful and healthy baby boy" Jo answered as Carina pulled Maya in for a quick kiss.
I smiled widely at that interaction, but inside of my head there was a hint of sadness due to all of the blank spaces I had in my past. Was my mom happy to know I was a girl? Were my parents happy like my moms? Were they still together? Maybe they had other kids that they loved more than me...
"Are you okay Lia?" Maya asked as soon as a tear escaped from my eyes. The fact that she noticed immediately was weird but comforting at the same time. She cared...
"It's just... I'm just... I'm okay..." I mumbled, taking a deep breath "This kid is just so lucky to have you as his moms".
"He is lucky to have you as his big sister, and remember this Bambina. We are always here for you. His arrival won't change a thing" Carina reassured me and I smiled at them.
They were my family. If my biological family didn't love me enough to keep me, at least I had them to be there for me.
Biology and blood didn't make a family. Love did.

Carina's Pov

After the exam, Hailee had to study with Manon, and Maya, still tired after her long shift, went home to rest for a while.
"Are you sure you don't want to come home with me?" Maya asked from the door of my office with my car keys in her hand.
"I'm sure Maya. You can go home and rest, I need a moment with my thoughts and my God..." I answered, already sure that she'd understood my need for calm to think about my past and what was happening in my present.
With a nod of her head she blew me a kiss and she went home, leaving me with my own thoughts.
I walked swiftly toward the chapel, opening the door that was so familiar to me. I was expecting to find it empty, but on the front row's bench there was Amelia with her head low.
The room was silent, but from time to time a soft whimper escaped from my friend's lips.
Amelia was crying. She was crying and I felt like I was invading someone else's space.
I tried to walk away slowly, without making any sound, but suddenly the door shut close behind me and she turned her head in my direction.
"Sorry, I didn't know someone was in here" I mumbled embarrassed and she smiled at my goofiness behind her puffy eyes and the tears.
"No, it's okay... Are you here to pray?" Amelia asked "I can leave if you want".
"This place is open for everyone... And I needed to clear my head. You don't have to leave if you want to stay" I answered, lighting a candle and sitting next to her on the bench.
I sent a prayer to God, thanking him for the gift of my son and for my wonderful daughter.
"What do you need to clear your mind about?" my friend asked and I looked at her from under my eyelashes.
"Look, if you don't want to talk about it with me, it's okay. But I just saw an eighteen year old boy overdose in front of me and I need to distract myself" she explained in a whisper.
"You know that Maya and I took in a sixteen year old girl a couple of months ago and now I'm pregnant... Well, that girl is the daughter that I gave up for adoption when I was twenty two and now... Now I'm being eaten alive by guilt" I said, earning a confused glance from my friend.
"I know it sounds absurd, trust me, sometimes I have a hard time believing it's her, but it's the truth and I can't help but feel like a jerk. She could have had everything... I've always loved her so much that it destroyed me when I saw her go... I knew that I couldn't be a mother back then, but maybe I could have done more for her...".
"Carina you are not a jerk and Hailee is so damn lucky to have you as a mother, even if you had to make an impossible choice, and maybe you weren't physically there for her in the first part of her life, but you were there with your mind, with your heart and with every inch of your soul" she answered and I let out a deep, shaky breath.
"I can see her when we talk about her brother... She has this lost gaze and I know that she's thinking about the parents that 'didn't want her', but what hurts the most is being conscious that I am the only one to blame for everything that she didn't have growing up... It's my fault" I admitted and by surprise Amelia leaned her head on my shoulder.
"You are there for her, helping her navigate all the feelings that she has right now. But for doing this, you have to let go of this guilt that you're carrying with you, because it will only make everything harder and you will not enjoy and live this second chance" she said "Before a meeting, we always repeat one sentence, and I know that you're not an addict, but I think you could find in it a piece of truth for yourself".
"What's the sentence?" I asked quietly.
"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference".

A.N. Hi guys, what did you think about this chapter? Did you guess correctly? I'll see you on friday with chapter 20❤.