Butterfly Effect

38: Big conversations

Carina's Pov

It was a normal Sunday Morning and Hailee, Rowan and I were waiting for Maya to finish her twenty four hour shift, when Lia walked in the living room with a book in her hands.
"Mamma? Posso chiederti una cosa? (Can I ask you something?)" she asked as she sat on the couch next to me while I was rocking Rowan to sleep.
"Yes Bambina. Cosa c'è? (What's up?)" I responded with a warm smile and I noticed her nervous fidgeting of her fingers.
"How did you... How did you know you were ready? You know... To have sex..." she asked, looking down at the Percy Jackson book in her hands with a bright blush on her cheeks.
"I was fifteen and it was with my first boyfriend" I started to explain, trying to get a glimpse of her eyes "I don't know how I knew it, though. It just felt right for me because I knew that I could trust him, and in my naive way I loved him. Do you feel ready?".
"I have no idea, mamma..." she admitted, and I could clearly hear that she was about to cry by the sound of her voice and by the hunch of her shoulders.
I decided to put Rowan down in his bassinet and I wrapped her in my arms, letting her cry on my shoulder as she clinged to me for dear life.
"È tutto okay Bambina. Non c'è bisogno di piangere. (Everything is okay Bambina. There's no reason to cry)" I whispered in her ear, rubbing her back soothingly, and she slowly started to calm down in my embrace.
"I'm sorry mamma..." she said so quietly that I thought she hadn't even said anything.
"You don't have to feel sorry about anything. You feel safe with your girlfriend and you both care so much about each other" I reassured her, trying to make her understand that her feelings were more than valid.
"I love her, mamma..." she clarified "She sees me for who I am, not for my past and the scars that it left on me".
"That is exactly another reason why you shouldn't feel sorry about this. I just want you to be sure about it before anything happens".
"Sure about what?" my wife asked as she arrived home from work with a huge smile on her face. I looked at Hailee, wanting to see if she was willing to share our conversation with Maya, but she shook her head no.
"Nothing..." I answered "And why are you all smiley right now?".
"Well, I was getting ready to leave the station when our lawyer called me. It was a very long conversation, but, long story short, we have a court date for the adoptions. Both Rowan and Lia's" she replied and Hailee let out a relieved laugh.
"Will I... Will I be a Deluca-Bishop?" she asked incredulously.
"We never talked about this... If you want to keep your legal last name, you can. I know that changing that piece of yourself might be a lot" I said and Maya nodded in agreement. We would never ask her to give up a part as big as that one of her identity.
"No... All of my family is made by Deluca-Bishops. I want to be a Deluca-Bishop too. I don't care about having Donovan as a last name..." she answered, strongly convinced by her decision.
"Okay Sunshine, then you'll be a Deluca-Bishop too" Maya stated.
"Can I... Can I change my middle name too?" she asked, slightly unsure.
"Yeah, sure Bambina... Do you have something in mind about it?" I answered, knowing that she must have thought about it a long time before bringing this up with us.
"I do, yeah... But if it's a problem with you, I can totally stick with my middle name, it's fine either way..." she mumbled, looking at me.
"I'm sure it's perfect. What is it?" I assured her, looking at her while she tried to take some deep breaths.
"Benedetta" she said and my heart stopped. "I want to be Hailee Benedetta Deluca-Bishop. If that's okay with you...".
I stared at her as those words that I've dreamt about for so long left her mouth.
I didn't know what to do... What to say...
"Y-y.you hate the idea, don't you? Non avrei dovuto dirlo... (I shouldn't have said it...)" she blurted out, playing nervously with her fingers.
"I love the idea, Bambina... But I want you to promise us that you're doing this for yourself and not for me" I answered, looking briefly at my wife.
"I promise you, moms. It's who I am meant to be..." she responded and I smiled sweetly at my perfect little girl.
"Then you'll be Hailee Benedetta Deluca-Bishop, Sunshine".

Hailee's Pov

That afternoon I went to Manon's place, just to spend some time with her and to give her the news of the adoption hearing.
"So, you're going to court for the adoption of July 29th?" she asked as her fingers gently scratched my scalp and my head lied on her chest.
"Yes... And then I'll legally be my moms' child, and no one will be able to take me away from them. From you..." I answered, tilting my head back and pressing my lips on hers in a tender kiss.
After a while, I smiled into the kiss, turning around and deepening the kiss, asking for access with my tongue. Manon kissed me back with force, taking control of the kiss right away and making me forget every worried thought that I had.
It was a kiss created out of love, trust and patience. The kind of kiss that makes your heart beat faster against your ribs and that makes the blood rush into your cheeks, painting them with a deep shade of red.
It was the kind of kiss that usually scared the shit out of me...
That day I wasn't going to focus on my fears, though. I was going to focus on who I was with, so the girl that made me laugh without a word and that loved me for who I was.
My best friend... My first love...
When her kiss made me let out a soft moan, I froze for one split second, but then I remembered that the hands on my body and the lips against mine were the ones of my loving girlfriend, and I kept kissing her, bringing her hands at the hem of my t-shirt.
Noticing my movements, she separated our lips and she rested her forehead on mine, looking at me in the eyes.
"Lia... What are you doing?" she asked in a soft whisper and I swallowed my fears once and for all.
"I think... I'm ready..." I answered in the same tone "I trust you. I love you... And I want to share this moment with you".
She looked at me to confirm what I'd just said, so I nodded and she placed a kiss on my lips, two delicate kisses on both of my cheeks, and then she moved to my jaw, my neck, the top of my chest...
"Promise me that you'll stop me the moment you're not comfortable anymore. Tell me and I'll stop immediately" she asked, holding the soft fabric of my t-shirt in her hands.
"I will. I promise" I replied and she gave me another kiss on the lips, then she removed my shirt, making me lay down on the mattress.
What happened next was something completely new for me. Manon was gentle, and slow, and attentive to every single reaction that my body had to her touch.
She took her time to explore every last inch of my body with her curious fingertips, and then she did the same with her lips, memorizing what my body looked like and what gave me the most pleasure.
She focused on me, making me feel seen and cared for. Making me feel loved...
Every time that I had sex before, it was always focused on the pleasure of the guy that was supposed to be my foster father, it was never about me...
When I finished, Manon laid next to me on the bed, circling my naked body with her arms and letting me cuddle into her side.
She said that I didn't need to do anything to her, that I could take my time with all of this...
In the sweet silence of the moment, I started to tear up because of all the emotions of what happened, letting my tears fall on her chest.
"Lia, are you okay?" she asked concerned "Was it too much?".
"No... No, it was perfect" I reassured her with a smile "I just... I just love you so much, and I'm happy that I shared this moment with you".