Dear Reader...

Chapter Thirty One

~Juliette~

Holy shit.

It's like an actual engagement ring. Not a fake one. Not one he's bought in a corner store.

"I thought the box was a little bulky and I had an interview this morning. I bought it before I came out." Before he came out. Fuck off.

"Noah. I don't- I don't know what to say."

"One word. 3 letters Jules. That's all you have to say." I should say no right? 48 hours ago, I'd have called myself crazy for saying he was here let alone here, asking me to marry him and I'm actually considering it. I don't want to say no. I don't think I should say yes. ARRRGGGHHHH. "Baby?"

"AUNTIE JULES?!" Fucking saved by the 7-year-old. My eyes go wide, wrapping over the ring and pulling Noah's hands down as she thunders into the room. "Auntie Jules."

"Yes Anya."

"I can't reach it."

"Can't reach what?"

"The thing."

"Ah. Yes. The thing." She scowled at me.

"I NEED IT NOW." I cock an eyebrow as she stomps her foot.

"Want to take a deep breath for me and try that a little better?" She growled. Like a dog and I stared. "Yeah, I think we need to take 5 breaths."

"Noooo."

"Then can we try asking for help without the demand please?" She huffs.

"I can't reach your book on the top shelf and I want to read it. Please can you help?"

"So much better Anya. Thank you for helping me understand." I climbed off Noah's lap and he jumped up.

"I'll get it for you Ans." He didn't even look back over his shoulder and she grabbed his hand, tugging him towards the stairs.

"Are you Fin and Pip's daddy?"

"I am."

"Are you their seed daddy too?" I covered my face, sitting back on the arm of the sofa. What the fuck is my life now? This is absolutely mental. I can't avoid that question forever. As much as I can try, it's not going to work. He's going to ask me for an answer when we're next alone and I need to have a response that isn't 'you're in-fucking-sane.'

"Hello?!" I lifted my head as the front door opened. Riley walked in slowly, bags in arm, raised eyebrow.

"Hi. Need a hand?"

"No I'v-" I grabbed a bag out of her hand. "got it?"

"Where's Ste?"

"Getting the other ba- what's up with you?"

"Hm? Oh. Noah's here."

"What?"

"Mhm. Turns out he's staying, had a job interview, proposed, he's helping Any-"

"WHAT?!"

"Shh the twins are asleep."

"I'm sorry. I don't think I heard you right."

"Oh no you did." I put the bag on the side, knocked the serious look off my face as we were joined by Ste in the kitchen. "Hi Ste. You've got this right? Thanks." I grabbed Riley's hand, pulled her down to the nursery, flicking the monitor off before quietly closing the door. She can't shout in here. I can't breakdown in tears and no one's going to disturb us in case they wake them up. I start pacing. Up and down quietly as she sits down in the rocking chair in the corner.