Crowley/Lucifer FanFiction

Empty

****************Lucifer's POV*********************

I was knelt on the floor in the middle of the fairground. Surrounded by bodies. 

I felt empty. 

I felt helpless. 

I felt like a failure. 

I couldn't focus on anything, my vision was blurry, my thoughts were clouded, I didn't know what to do. I didn't know where to start looking for her, the pain was too much. I knew I needed to search the depths of heaven and earth but I couldn't move. 

"Lucifer?" It was Castiel's voice

"What the hell did you do!!" Dean yelled, grabbing me by the collar, shaking me as he screamed in my face. When I didn't respond he punched me. 

"Dean!" Sam yelled at him, 

I fell to the floor sobbing. 

"I'm sorry" I whimpered "I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" 

"Lucifer what happened?" Castiel asked

"I'm sorry" I continued "I'm so sorry Gracie"

"Gracie?" Dean asked "Lucifer what did you do?!"

"She's gone" I whispered, catching my breath "They took her, she's gone"

"Who's gone?" Sam asked "Grace?"

"Lily" I whispered "They took Lily"

"Who took her!" Dean demanded, pulling me to sit up

"I don't know" I cried, shaking my head, tears and snot streaming down my face "I turned my back for a second, just a second"

"Christ Lucifer!" Sam yelled "What were you thinking!"

"I'm sorry" I sobbed again "I don't know what to do....tell me what to do!?"

"Did you kill all these people?" Castiel asked, I glanced around, my eyes widening at the realisation of what I'd done.

"I......I don't remember" I gasped, pulling myself up and stumbling around the bodies. Did I kill all these people?

"Pull yourself together" Sam yelled, grabbing me "What happened to Lily?"

"I paid for some tokens and when I turned around she was gone" I confessed

"When was this?" Dean asked "How long has she been gone?"

"I...I don't know" I began to sob again "I can't remember" I ran my fingers through my hair and pulled at it as I took in my surroundings "Oh god....so many...she's never going to forgive me for this" 

"Lucifer right now we need to focus on finding Lily before anyone else gets hurt" Sam told me "Do you have any idea who might have taken her? Were you being followed?"

"Was it demons?" Dean asked "Angels maybe?"

"I didn't see anyone" I groaned "I wasn't looking....we were just having fun...I just wanted her to have fun"

"Well now she's gone" Dean hissed "And it's all your fault!" 

"Enough Dean!" Castiel snapped "These bodies are still warm, if it was demons they couldn't have gone far. If it was angels they could be anywhere"

"Fantastic" Sam snapped "We better split up"

"Me and Cas will follow the angel theory" Dean suggested "You can babysit the devil and follow the demon theory"

"Gee thanks" Sam hissed, but before he could protest anymore Dean and Cas had vanished.

"Sam I..." I tried to explain or apologise, maybe a bit of both.