"What I'm trying to say is, I can keep a secret, for as long as I like. I can take secrets to my grave." her tone lowers, their eye contact doesn't ease, "But I need you to promise me you'll do that too. Because if you do, we'll be okay. We'll be sa...
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Denial.
What a great way to force yourself to feel better, to feel like you haven't done anything wrong. Because - as it's been said - denial is the ultimate comfort zone. You cannot do anything wrong in that fluffy, soft place.
Denial.
What a great way to also waste your time.
As if you're not eventually going to give into the truth. Living a lie would be suffocating, painful. Like there's a solid coat of false narratives shielding your skin, your whole body. But that coat will break, one way or another, now or later.
Jungkook has decided to fight it. Like he always does when something doesn't go according to his plan.
He denies what he felt when Jay was here, enforced himself to think it was just because how much if an asshole he is and Jungkook doesn't agree Vivi should be seeing someone like that. Thinks she deserves so much better. Someone safer, someone trustworthy. Someone who knows how to protect her, someone who's trained...
Yeah, his mind went a little off track with that.
Jungkook denies his thoughts when he wakes up the day they're leaving for France. Denies everything when he takes his luggage to the first floor hall. Agrees with Sunmi when she tells him 'She likes to shop a lot there so prepare to get bored.'. Shuts down his inner voice when it tells him 'You won't get bored.'.
Denies it all, fights every morcel of the supposed truth that's begging for Jungkook to listen to it, at least for a moment.
But he doesn't have to.
Because the second he lands his eyes on hers again, it's over for him. The coat of lies shatters into pieces, perishes away from his solid body. Leaves behind a totally fucked up Jungkook.
There's no denying as they leave to the airport and Vivi talks to him the entire drive, tells him about a reality show she's been watching, Singles Inferno. She tells him how she can't ever even imagine being in such show and how one of the guys looks exactly like Jungkook. He barely comments, just listens to her voice, has a small smile the entire time it's caressing his ears.
There's no denying when they walk through the airport, side by side this time, while carrying their own bags to get to the private gate. He feels at ease as Vivi seems to do as well. The way she won't stop talking to him about whatever pops into her head. The way she makes him laugh with her witty comments and expressive storytelling. Her state of mind tells him nerves are not welcome today and it makes him wonder why.
Jungkook hates the truth today a little bit more because it complicates things, prevents his self-consciousness to step up and put his work first, like it always should be.
He hates the truth when they board Mr. Park's private jet, the luxurious plane reminding him what he's really here for but forgets it as soon as Vivi comes to sit in front of him towards the back of the plane instead of taking her own space and sitting alone at the front.
