I look up from my plate at the melodious sound of William's laughter. We're at the table, eating, and William is seated right across from me, my sister to my right and Anna to my left, James next to him. I'm still eating when I feel something brush against my foot. I frown and straighten my face towards the only being that exists for me. I meet William's worried gaze. He seems to be asking me if I'm all right. I nod weakly before turning to Desmond, who speaks up.
-No, but you see, what I mean is that a person is necessarily heterosexual! In this world, it's impossible to be anything else! These people invent things for themselves... It's not natural to love someone of the same sex as you! It's...
-A disease. Finish James
-Exactly! Confirms Desmond. A disease. Homosexuality... is a disease. It can't be accepted.
I swallow hard and meet William's gaze. His spikes have tightened around his cutlery and his jaws are clenching. These words hurt him as much as me.
-How is being homosexual a disease? Asks William calmly.
Desmond clears his throat before frowning.
-Come on, boy! Homosexuality is against nature! It's against the law! Why do you ask? It doesn't even concern you!
I watch William's reaction carefully and frown as I see a lightning flash through his eyes. He's about to reveal everything. I press my foot against his and give him a negative nod.
-That's where you're wrong... He whispers.
His sentence dropped like a bomb. A deadly silence settles over the table and my heart starts to race. I'm frightened. Terribly afraid for William. That sentence he's just whispered that everyone else has heard... this sentence is going to change his life forever.
I catch William's tear-fogged gaze and my heart sinks. He quickly leaves the table and exits the house without further ado, slamming the door behind him. Desmond clears his throat and James rises to his feet.
-I'm going to see him. He says, annoyed, before leaving the house.
I breathe to try and calm down. I wish I could run out and join him. Reassure him. Tell him he won't have to face this situation alone... But instead, I'm just sitting here on this chair. Powerless. Until I heard William shouting at James and I heard my name called several times. I panic. My heart starts beating faster and faster, almost as if I'm having a panic attack. My leg starts to shake and I feel I'm losing control as I find it harder and harder to breathe.
-I'm going to get some air... I whisper.
I get up and walk, not without difficulty, to the door. Once outside, I breathe. The wind feels good. But that doesn't mean I can rest. I've got to find William. So I start walking down the deserted street until I reach another small perpendicular street. I don't have time to figure out what's going on. First I'm hit in the back, then in the sides, then in the face, and at the last blow, I recognize James perfectly. Then he gets pulled from behind and I sit up a bit on the ground. William holds him back from hitting me.
-Don't touch Louis! He cried. You're gay, you love me, so what?
I frown. James? In love with William? I don't understand...
-Will, you know I can't tell my family! They're all fucking homophobes! So yes, I make everyone think I'm just like them. But I love you Will... it's been years!
-You know perfectly well it's not mutual... Why just because I said I was concerned, do you confess your feelings to me James? Why have you never told me this before? And above all, why are you so violent towards Louis? Why do you think? That he'll steal me from you?
