Stray Kids Oneshots Collection (Smut & Fluff)

20 ¦ To You

Warnings: Suicidal thoughts, implied suicide (no graphic description), open ending

Ship: Hyunjin / Jeongin

Words: 484

Summary: And so he goes back to sleep too – sometimes Hyunjin wishes it would be eternal. Wants them to be like this forever, just him and Jeongin hugging and holding each other for days and weeks. Why be members of society if you can exist and breathe like this?

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Hyunjin stretches his arms and neck. His hands cradle up Jeongin's back, along with the oversized shirt he is wearing. Jeongin breathes softly, his eyes remaining closed in the current position they have been lying on top of each other for hours.

That's all that Hyunjin wants to do – day and night. His eyes wander down the younger's body, where their limbs are connected and messy. They are skin to skin, and they have been sleeping for so long like this, so that Hyunjin can't feel anymore which body part belongs to whom.

Jeongin shifts a little in his hold, his head gets turned to the other side, still pressed close to Hyunjin's chest. His lips puff a little, and his eyelid twitch for a moment. Hyunjin stares down at him in awe, his heart burns and burns, but his lips don't morph into a smile.

And so he goes back to sleep too – sometimes he wishes it would be eternal. Wants them to be like this forever, just him and Jeongin hugging and holding each other for days and weeks. Why be members of society if you can exist and breathe like this?

Jeongin is so warm against him, so beautiful in his arms. He feels so real, but so fake too.

Hyunjin blinks his eyes twice, just to make sure he isn't illuding himself.

The bed sheets are cold, goosebumps are forming on his skin. Hyunjin comes to face with reality.

No Jeongin, no warmth comforting him during their moments. Only pills scattered in his own hands which he lets fall in pure shock on the mattress.

Life again shows his true face, and Hyunjin once again realizes the worsening state of his mind.

Jeongin's death is still something he is processing, but it seems he himself can't make it through. Maybe, Jeongin is still here?

He stretches out his hands and feet. They feel so far away. Maybe he isn't real too. Everything might be his own illusion too.

A cool tear falls down his cheek as he stares blankly at his own body. There used to be a Jeongin lying on top of him once. No now more.

Hyunjin doesn't want to continue living through life if he can't enjoy it. If there is nothing that he can love about.

The window in the bedroom is wide open, air is directly hitting his face. Hyunjin turns his head towards the window, where the curtain is slightly dancing out of the frame.

He doesn't acknowledge standing up, but just suddenly realizes he is sitting on the ledge. Well maybe, he can find Jeongin out there. Maybe, his mind will allow him to be more at peace once he leaves this place.

And so, with a quick push, he jumps – he feels light for a few moments. He yearns in those for the closeness he can soon feel with Jeongin again.

Peace.