Mostly Minecraft -- A Youtuber Oneshot Book

BajanFrags -- You're Too Alive For Me

There are two ways to live your life. At some point everyone realizes that existence is a lie, and living is futile. There are some people who can choose to embrace that, and live their lives to the fullest, cherishing every day and being of the mindset that "nothing I do matters, might as well enjoy myself!" Yeah, these people can be sad, angry, or upset sometimes, but they choose to live happily because why not?

And then there's me. My name is Mitchell Donnell Ralph Hughes, and I'm the other type

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Every day to me is a burden. It's hard to function after coming to the realization that everything I do is pointless. Yeah, I act fun in videos, but it's difficult to maintain that cheerfulness all the time. At times like this, sitting on my bed with a laptop, editing a video, it all comes rushing back; the helplessness, the uselessness, and the pointlessness.

I finish up the last cut in the lucky block video I filmed yesterday with Jerome, where he accidentally slammed his toe into his desk and screamed the "F word". Closing my laptop in relief, I head to my desk, where my pc sits, and see that I've been invited to a call with Preston, Vik, and Rob. With nothing better to do, or at least nothing worth doing, I accept the call.

The first words I hear upon entering the call are "I'm worried about him!" from Preston. I decide to mute my mic, instead listening to what they have to say.

"Don't be Preston! Mitch is fine. He seems perfectly ok to me, and I recorded a skywars with him yesterday," Rob says in response. Oh. So they're talking about me.

"Yeah bro. Usually I'm with you on these things but I'm pretty sure you're just over analyzing this one. Mitch isn't depressed or anything." Vik chimes in. It kinda hurts how little they notice, but I guess that's to be expected. It's not like I jump around screaming, "I don't care about living!"

"Guys just listen! I know Mitch isn't happy and I want to help him!" Preston argues. Oh Preston. Even his voice just ticks me off. He's too happy. I hate that. He's like the exact opposite of me. He knows he's gonna die just as much as I do, yet he just uses it as an excuse to laugh that beautiful laugh of his and grin his adorable little smile.

I hate him for still being strong. I hate him for not breaking down and dwelling on the past. I hate him for his chocolate brown hair, and his shining eyes, and his cute voice. I hate him for making me love him.

Rob speaks up. "Listen Preston, if you're this worried why don't you go visit him?" Preston's face lights up. His webcam is on, so I can see the smile break out over his features.

"That's a great idea Rob! Thanks buddy!" He's always been so spontaneous. I decide to leave the call. Clearly they don't need me.

Seconds later I receive a call from Preston. Rolling my eyes, I answer it. The Texan's face appears before me, his bubbly smile still visible.

"Hey Mitch!" He says cheerfully.

"Ay Dude." I respond back. His smile fades just a bit at my less enthusiastic answer, but it almost immediately returns to its former huge grin.

"I wanted to know if I could visit for a bit! You know, hang out with my main Mitchie! And Lachy and J-Rome." I love when he calls me that. I hate it.

"Sure man! I'd love that! I'll get the guest room set up. When are you coming?" I'm not lying. I love hanging out with you, it's just that after you're gone I feel even more broken. I think to myself, or at least I thought I did, but by the way Preston's smile falters again I can assume I said it out loud.

Shit.

"I'll be there..." He looks at his other monitor, probably at the flights from Texas to Florida. "Monday sound good?" I nod. Three days. I can live with that. Then again I can live with anything. Doesn't really matter.