ZHAN'S POV
Since the death of my beloved, I’ve always dreamt of seeing him again even if it’s just a glimpse though I knew deep within my heart that it was only a fantasy as the dead cannot come back to life but I still believe that my Yibo is still alive somewhere but I just can’t put a name to it. Ever since he left me, I’ve always been dreaming about him every single night. There are no night I’ve never dreamt of him. With me on his arms and him whispering sweet nothings to me and him teasing me that I wish I could remain in the dream forever but sadly morning still came. I’ve always long for hid touches, his kisses, his hugs, his scent, his everything. I miss him very dearly. I miss his face, I miss hearing him, I miss his touches that I could feel my body aching for it which I could only feel again in my dreams. That’s the one reason I never messed with my sleep because going to bed, I know that it’s time to see my love, my hubby. Despite how busy I am, I never missed my sleep because only there I could get motivation that he’s still with me, close to my already broken heart and seeing him coming towards me and through my door I couldn’t stop my thoughts from running wild. How could he leave me all these while? Without even saying anything to me made it way worse. I really couldn’t think straight at the moment and I only wanted to hold him in my arms as I was afraid of it being a dream and that is what I did. I ran towards him, taking him in my arms or maybe I should say he took me in his arms but still, I didn’t want to let go not until I perceived an unfamiliar scent instead of his usual one.
‘why is it vanilla? What happened to my sandalwood? And why does the hugs feels so…… different?’ I said in my thoughts but still refused to let go of him not until he forcefully released himself from my grip. He introduced himself to me and at that I felt the remaining of my heart shattering. Here I thought he came back to me while in reality it isn’t the case.
Now I got to access this Lan Wangji ‘which he said is his name' more closely. Though they look the same but the aura are different. My Yibo gives out that cold and manly vibes and he also has that possessive look of his which I’m quite obsessed with but this Wangji is quite an opposite. He has a manly look but looks very friendly, he’s got this smile which never for once left his lips that I couldn’t helping gulping down with the thought of my Yibo having the same lips that I couldn’t help but miss his kisses again, he’s kind of cute and got a friendly vibe.
Now I know why I’ve been hearing some gossips lately about my Yibo being seen for which I ignored as I’ve already investigated on this since the first time I heard about it.
I was very disappointed soon as I realised that he isn’t Yibo. How much my hearts breaks right now but I covered it up with a smile and welcomed him politely and I proceeded with the interview deciding on handling my personal stuff later by the day. The interview went well, though he was already employed but I still want to know more about him because maybe there could be some misunderstandings that maybe my Yibo lost his memory and living someone else’s. I know that I’m just exaggerating about it but I still couldn’t help being curious. This guys looks exactly like my fuckin lover and the only thing keeping me sane right now is his character and his… I don’t know probably his life story.
In the end I couldn’t get anything useful but I won’t give up yet. I ended up sending him over to Ziyi for her to finish the job as I was not mentally stable right now and I needed a break to think more into this so with an excuse of meeting a client, I left the company and immediately sending a mail to my private investigator to search more about this Wangji ASAP.
I received a reply from him immediately I stepped into my room which was actually mine and Yibo's. Resting on my bed, I looked through the information that was sent to me. I sighed heavily when I found no connection between them. I frowned at what I read on my tablet. How cruel this world is for doing something like that to a young innocent child. If I were him I would definitely fight for my home not leaving it to some jerk but after reading more, *sighs* there was nothing he could really do about it afterall.
“you really left me alone in this world huh?” I said out loud and sighed again.
Placing my tablet next to me, I laid down on my back while looking at the ceiling lost in thought and I slowly turn my head to the right side of my bed and smiled at what I saw. Stretching my hand, I picked up the photo frame that is laid neatly on my bedside table and caresses his face and at that tears fells out freely from my eyes.
“if it wasn’t for that horrible day, we would be married by now, we would be raising our Yuan together, working together with me cooking dinner and welcoming you home with a kiss after your stressful day at work, we would even have another child right now.” I smiled to myself.
“I really wanted to fulfill your wishes. You wanting to be called dad, you taking care of a little one, we all celebrating his birthday together, I still think having a girl will be cuter. But sadly, you aren’t here for us to make those wishes come true.” i said smiling sadly. Caressing the face of my beloved, I placed a kiss on the photo frame and giggled.
