Nightmares in the Northwest

Mistdale Snowman Contest

It was December 20th in Mistdale. Five days before Christmas. People were doing their best to scramble to the stores for their final Christmas shopping runs. Emily was setting up the tree in the underground classroom where the Mistdale Team resided.

"Ok, now that we have the Christmas tree, what to top it off with?" Emily held up an Iron Maiden ornament.

"Iron Maiden goes on the top, because they were formed on December 25th. Jesus was born in the summer. It's just that the Roman Emperor converted to Christianity and moved the birth of Jesus to the 25th to coincide with the birth of the Roman Sun God Saturn."

"Merry Iron Maiden-Mas!" Al cheered. Emily put the Iron Maiden ornament at the top of the tree.

"Wait!" Katie interrupted. "Britney Spears was also born on December 25th! Shouldn't she get a celebration?"

"Sorry, we can have Britneymas next year. I already called Dibs on Iron Maiden-Mas." Emily reacted. Al opened a box of ornaments.

"These are just balls!" Al gasped, feeling shocked and angered.

"I wanted to keep things simple." Gloria explained. "And they're all black, like my world after I lost Phil."

"So, are we doing anything for the holidays?" Katie asked.

"I heard that Mistdale has their annual Winter Holiday festival at the park near the Cathanow Reservation, and they have a snowman building contest."

"Cool!" Emily reacted. "I could totally build a super cool snowman like no other. It will not be a snow man; it will be a snow woman instead. A strong independent snow woman."

"Aww, you're so cute when you act like a feminist." Al complimented Emily.

"So, what are we waiting for, let's make some snow people!" Gloria led everyone out of the school bunker and into Emily's car. She drove to the park near the Cathanow reservation. People were making snowmen of different designs. Some were making snow knights, snow samurai, and snow cowboys. Jalen and Shalom were making a snow model of an Iranian woman who was holding a torch.

"What's with the torch?" Jalen asked.

"It's an homage to America's Statue of Liberty." Shalom explained. "It's my symbol of the Third Iranian Revolution against the Ayatollah." The torch fell off, because there was no support to hold it.

"Shit, the torch fell off." Shalom whined. "Jalen, go and find a rod or tree branch or bundle up some snow to add as a support!" Jalen went to find some snow to stack up to support the snow torch.

Emily, Al, Gloria and Katie joined.

"So, you guys ready to build some snowmen?" Jalen asked.

"I am going to build a snow woman who will stomp all over your snowmen!" Emily taunted.

"Those are fighting words, geez." Jalen calmed Emily. "Besides, me and Shalom are building a snow woman too!"

"Oh look, an Iranian Statue of Liberty." Katie laughed.

"It's not a Statue of...never mind." Shalom reacted. Al started building his snowman, and it appeared to be Emily in a formal Japanese kimono.

"Aww, you're building me in a kimono?" Emily blushed. "That is so romantic!" Emily kissed Al on the cheek. Katie began building her snowman, and it wasn't even a human. It was a Kingfisher. Hank was sculpting a snowman in a top hat with a 9-millimeter in hand and holding a pimp cane.

"Hank." Katie asked, leaning up to him.

"Yea?" Hank answered. "What's shaking?"

"Your best friend Aaron is off in La-La Land, while you are stuck here in Mistdale." Katie explained. "How about we do an activity together after this." Emily was building a snow woman wearing a fabulous flowing dress and carrying a sword.