On the Sidelines

Chapter 32 Evie

The morning light assaults my eyelids, begging me to open them. My swollen eyes slowly blink open, blinking away the sleepies that have made their home along my water lines.

Alyssa lays in the spot beside me, breathing calm and even. She looks peaceful. For a moment I forget where I am and why I'm here but the buzzing of my phone is a stark reminder.

I pat around the mattress until I locate the buzzing device and immediately wish I hadn't. Tanner's face takes up my screen with his incoming call. I stare blankly at him until he disappears. Before the screen turns off I see the flood of messages he left me from last night to this morning.

I don't have the energy to read them yet but I don't want to stay in bed. Gingerly, I slide out from under the warm blankets, careful not to wake Alyssa.

Gloria is in the kitchen when I descend the stairs. Her smile is sweet when she sees me, sliding some bacon across the island while the smell of cooking eggs fill the air.

"Thank you." I can't tell if she didn't hear me or she chooses not to acknowledge how weak I sound. Either way, I can't bring myself to care.

"Eggs are almost done dearie." She sounds especially chipper this morning, but she's always happy when there's company. It doesn't matter what brought all of us to congregate here last night, she's just happy to have us.

My phone lights up again, another incoming call from Tanner. I hesitate to answer. I know my feelings are valid but I can't help but wonder if I over reacted.

Yeah we don't see each other often so our time together is precious, but also, we don't see each other often. He's not used to having to divide his attention. I'm hurt, I shouldn't have to beg for my boyfriend's attention. So I let the call go to voicemail like all the rest.

"It's alright to feel how you do." I look up at Gloria who's watching me intently. "What he did was not okay but your relationship straddles a thin line. Yeah, you got together before he became famous, but that's not the case anymore. This situation will come up anytime you leave the house. You have to talk about this and come up with a solution. But it is alright to need some time to wrap your head around what happened."

I return her soft smile, taking a bite of the crispy maple bacon. "Thank you. We usually have really good communication but when I can't get his attention to communicate what I feel, what should I have done? Stayed and hoped he would give me a moment of his time?"

"I don't know dearie. Greg and I have had our fair share of issues but I never had to fight the public for his attention. I don't think there was a right or wrong thing to do. In the moment, the option you thought was the best was to leave, to get some space between you two. And that's okay. You're thinking more clearly this morning, so I would say you made the right decision." She turns back to the stove to stir the eggs.

Greg ambles in from their shared bedroom down the hall. He once again takes the seat next to me, offering comfort with his presence. He has never been very talkative, more the strong and silent type. But he never really needed words. The best advice is the one you come up with on your own. He told me that last year after a headline popped up with an accusation of Tanner cheating. It wasn't true but it hit me hard.

We eat in silence, letting the quiet hum of the morning soothe my racing mind. Tanner has called three more times and on the fourth, Greg grunts and answers. I can vaguely hear Tanner's voice come through the receiver but I can't make out what he's saying.

"Sorry buddy, this isn't your girl. This is Greg, Natalia's father." Greg's deep timber fills the room earning me a quizzical glance from Gloria. "I'm only going to say this once, you fucked up. Sorry honey." Gloria scowls, giving her back to her husband. "You hurt our Evie and that's not alright. She needs some time to come to terms with what happened. To come to terms with knowing she fought for your attention and failed. She'll contact you when she's ready." He abruptly hangs up and replaces my phone in the space between us.