I Love You Still

Chapter 7. Friends

Jamie's pov

I had struggles to fall asleep. Claire was sleeping a few rooms away from me. My wife was so close and yet so far away. Claire had called Frank to tell him she'd be staying for a few months and that in the mean time it was best if they didn't have to much contact. He hadn't been happy and insisted she'd tell him where she was and with who but instead she apologized and hung up the phone.

She told me that my family was willing to help her get her memory back and that if I couldn't do it she'd understand. I turned around constantly in my bed, deciding wether I should or shouldn't help. I really wanted to, if there was a change she'd remember and we could live our happily ever after, I would do anything to make that happen. But if she wouldn't remember I'd be stuck reliving everything, and I ken that is verra painful.

2 hours after everyone had gone to bed, I went to Claire's room. I softly knocked on the door and her soft voice called for me to come in. ''Claire, can we speak?'' I ask and she nods, smiling at me kindly. ''Is there something I can help you with, Jamie?''

''I want to help you get your memory back, I'm going to fight for you Claire, for us.'' I tell her and she nods. ''I know you love me, I can feel it. It's like my soul knows and my brain doesn't. My heart is in between them. But Jamie I cannot promise anything! I cannot promise I'll remember,'' she warns and I nod. ''I've been thinking about this for 2 hours and I've come to the conclusion that if I help you get your memory back and it doesn't work, I did everything I possibly could for us,''

She smiles briefly and I get ready to leave again when she stops me. ''Will you tell my friends tomorrow about me and have them come over? The sooner we start, the better,'' she smiles and I nod, smiling a wee bit. ''Aye Sassenach , I'll give them a ring tomorrow,''

'' Sassenach ?'' she asks and I look at her. ''It's no' meant as an insult, I use... used it as a word of endearing,'' I explain and she nods heavily. ''I know, I remember I think,'' she whispers, looking confused and I rush to her side. ''You remember?'' I ask feeling much hope.

She pats her hand on the bed, telling me to sit down. ''I used to get these little flashbacks, I suppose they were memories,'' she whispers as if it is a secret. ''What did ye see or remember?''

''One time I saw a ferris wheel, the next time I saw a picnic basket and the last time it was a voice saying Sassenach, your voice saying Sassenach,'' she confesses and I smile a little. We sit there in silence for a few moments realising what is happening. Eventually I lean forward and give her a kiss on her forehead. ''Those are small sparks of hope, Claire.'' she nods and gives a brief smile, making my heart a hundred times faster.

''Goodnight, Sassenach ,'' I say softly and she smiles sweetly. ''Goodnight, Jamie,'' she whispers back and I leave her room. Back in my own room a few tears drop but I sit down on the bed, praying to God, that he will help Claire remember. I lay down on the bed and mutter. ''Goodnight Sassenach, ye are truly home again,'' just seconds before dozing off.

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Claire's pov

I knew I was home, it just felt like it but I also felt out of place at the same time. These people, my family, they had memories of me, things I had said, things we had done and they desperately wanted me to remember but for me they were just strangers.

The next morning when I walk down the stairs everyone is already gathered. ''Claire, there ye are!'' Ellen says enthousiastically. She gives me a quick hug before she hurries back to the kitchen. ''I hope I haven't slept to long,'' I say softly and William shakes his head. ''Nay lass, we're early birds but we can keep our stomach's calm for hours if we have tae, yer fine,'' he says kindly. ''Besides Ellen wanted a full breakfast table, she was no where near done when we got up,'' Murtagh says grinning and I smile. ''Well I hope you are all hungry, cause I'm not a big breakfast eater,''