I Love You Still

Chapter 10. Family

Claire's pov

Jamie walks off behind his mom before I can do anyhting, I turn to Jenny and doesn't look pleased. ''What were the talking about?'' I ask and she looks at me with teary eyes. ''Let sit down, shall we. Then I'll tell ye the whole story.''

We sits down on the bench and Jenny sighs. ''Around 3 months after yer dead, Jamie woke up every night crying out for you, we knew he dreamt of ye all the time but we couldna change it. We also knew he was barely alive, he didna eat much, he didna sleep much and when he did sleep he dreamt of ye, he was so broken and we all kent it.''

''One night, we were all sitting downstairs talking about God knows what, when a loud crash came from upstairs, the sound of class breaking. We all ran upstairs to find Jamie's window broken, he had trown a stone trough it, a big stone, making the whole window break,''

''He stood there, back bent, hands leaning on the windowsill. One jump forward and he was outside. Mam tried to stop him from anything like that and started telling him to come away from the window. He didn't move at all, it was like he was frozen. After a second he stepped back a little but tried to jump anyway,'' I gasp and Jenny gives me a weak smile.

''It all went in slow motion, Jamie trying to jump, Dad and William's quick actions to grab him, my sobs and Mam's scream. Dad and William pinned him to the ground where he was sobbing and crying for them to let him go, so he could be with you,''

I release a breath I didn't realise I was holding. ''H was going to dive out of the window, Claire. He would've most likely ended on his head, he probably wouldn't have made it,''

''His neck would've broken or would've had severe head wounds,'' I say and she nods. ''I'm really sorry you all had to go through that, I wish there was something I could do,''

''You can't do anything,'' she says. ''No actuallu there is, go with me, Mam and aunt Jocastac on a two day trip starting tomorrow, we will do all the thing we did together, maybe ye remember anything then,''

I smile and nod. ''that's a lovely idea. I'm in,'' before can answer Jamie calls for us. We stand up and Jenny walks inside again , probably to Ellen. I slowly go to Jamie and wrap him in my arms. ''Oh Jamie,'' I hold him tightly and his arms wrap around me. ''Jenny told me what happend with the window and all...'' I say after a minute. ''She did what?''

''I'm not angry about it, rather thankful,'' I'm still hugging Jamie and he asks. ''Why would ye be thankful?''

''Because I don't want that to happen because of me,'' I say. ''Ye can't do anything about it Claire,'' I shake my head softly against his chest. ''I have not given all of this my all. I was scared to lose a good life but I realise now, I can only gain a good life,''

''If you were able to give up your life for me even though I was already dead, I can give up my life completely for at least 3 months to try and gets us back Jamie, no matter how hard that will be for both of us, I'm willing to give up everything,'' Jamie lets go of me and smiles.

''And I'm so verra grateful Sassenach,'' I smile and awkwardly look to his chest where I notice a necklace. ''This my necklace,'' I blurt out and Jamie's eyes widen. ''Aye,'' he whispers before taking it of. ''Our birthstones are in it, an Opal Gem for October and an Emerald gem for may,'' I says softly and Jamie nods again. ''It has an inscription, do ye ken what?''

''Well I had a bracelet too, so it's either 'Da Mi Basia Mille' or 'From J to C with love, always','' I say trying to remember which is which but give up after a few seconds. He hands me the necklace and when I turn it around it says. 'From J to C with love, always'

''Ye remembered,'' Jamie whispers softly, a teardrop falling from his eyes. ''My wedding ring was Lallybroch's key, wasn't it?'' I ask when I slowly caress it with my thumb. ''Aye, so ye kent the place was as much yours as mine,''

I smile at Jamie and he smiles back. Before either of us realise what is happening, Jamie puts his hand on my cheek and brings his lips to mine. ''I would very much like to kiss you,'' he whispers. ''May I?''

''We probably shouldn't...'' I whisper back. ''But who is gonna care?'' I smile and Jamie grins. ''Not me, all I want is to feel yer lips on mine,'' he says and I cup his head into my hands. ''Then do it,''