I'm Gonna Miss You

Chapter 23: The Wrong Story

There was a welcoming sensation to my cheeks as I woke up that morning. I could already feel my blush deepen as I thought about the previous night. My encounter with Dylan left me walking on clouds as I ate dinner with my family, unable to concentrate on the topic of conversation. I could still feel the faint buzzing of my heart as Dylan looked into my eyes, leaving me both breathless and helpless. Every tingling sensation came back in one large wave as I recounted the scene out on the roof.

I squealed as I covered my face with my blanket, smiling like an idiot from underneath. I was kicking at the air, trying to get rid of all the giddy energy inside of me. Dylan certainly had an effect on me, one I loved but at the same time hated. He was the perfect guy for me; funny, sweet, caring, good looking, smart, talented, athletic, and he was such a gentleman. The only problem was, he had a girlfriend.

The rumbling from my stomach awoke me, pulling me away from my fantasies. I tossed the blanket aside, and picked up the fallen pillow through muscle memory. My mind was still in a daze, as I couldn't stop thinking of him-- my neighbour. As I got in the shower, I began to picture what would have happened if I had let him kiss me, if my parents hadn't come home right at that moment, and if I hadn't pushed him away.

Two options were available for my picking. The first one was that Dylan would kiss me, regret doing so, and then never talk to me again. This would include him having to tell Melony, letting her place a gigantic target on my back, and living in shame for letting him kiss me. Every step I took outside my house, would be worse than stepping into a warzone, worrying that Dylan would be there, sitting on his front porch, or even worse, that Melony would be there.

Thinking about the first choice, I felt happy that I didn't let him kiss me. As I thanked my ability to immediately go to the worst case scenario, I felt another push of thoughts run through my mind. The second case would be that he would kiss me, realize that he likes me the same way, break up with Melony, and stay with me. This was the kind of thing I wanted, but even if this left me with a 'happily-ever-after' it left someone else sad and rejected; Melony.

"Ugh." I groaned as I got out of the shower.

There really was no way for me to win, was there? Either I get to admire the perfect guy from behind my window, or I get to be with him at the risk of hurting another girl. That's when my newly established life motto came into play. 'Things will work themselves out. Just give it time.' Nelson's words still managed to ring in my head, giving me a new lease on life. I found it so much better to be able to think of Nelson in any other way aside from missing him. Of course I missed him, he was-- is my brother, but I couldn't keep regretting his passing. Eventually, I had to move on and choose to remember him for the good he did. Deep down, I knew all of this, I just didn't want to admit it. That's why it was difficult for me to let go of his letters.

In my white sleeveless shirt, light washed denim jeans, white sneakers, and my denim vest, I walked into the kitchen. I had gotten up earlier and moved quicker from my high spirits, allowing me to meet my parents just as they sat down for breakfast. Just like yesterday, my grandparents were still asleep, they must've had a lot to do last night. When I went up after dinner, Gran and Gramps were still cleaning up.

"Morning." I smiled.

"Good morning." My dad replied.

"Gran got you cereal. It's in the cabinet." I smiled at my mom.

"Thank you!" I skipped to the cabinet and pulled open the handle.

I took one look at the cereal box and realized it was my favourite; Cheerios. The golden brown circle magnified on the cover, brought a bigger smile to my face. This was hands down, the best breakfast I ever had. Feeling a burn on the back of my head, I turned to see my parents staring right at me. A common courtesy would be to pretend you weren't looking when the person you're staring at notices, but my parents decided not to follow that courtesy.