17. Jokes and jokes and jokes and...

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How do you make a tissue dance?
Blow a little boogie in it

What did the snowman want for lunch?
Chile dogs

What did Frosty the Snowman get from the lunch menu?
A Frosty

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they're really good at it...

What's orange and sounds like parrot?
Carrot

What's blue and smells like red paint?
Blue paint

What's grey and can't fly?
A parking lot

What is Forrest Gump's password?
1Forest1

Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels

Where do sick boats go?
The dock

What do you call Nitrogen after the sun rises?
Daytrogen

How often do I tell jokes about the elements?
Periodically...

What's the capital of Greece?
G

What's a cannibal's favorite spice?
Skinnamin

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Get in the car

What do you call a crazy judge?
Judgmental

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the P is silent

Where did Little Suzy go when the bomb hit?
Everywhere

Why is outer space so cold?
Because all the space heaters are on Earth

What do Royal Subjects call the King of Toilet Paper?
Your plyness

What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear

My grandpa has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

Helen Keller walks into a bar, table and a chair.

Two whales enter a bar. One says, "EUUUUUUUUUUUEWUEWIWWWEUEEEEEEEW!" (Whale noise)
The other one says, "Frank, what's wrong with you?"

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