Echoes Of War

58

In my dream, I find myself standing in the familiar confines of my childhood bedroom. It's just as I last remembered, nothing has changed–a relic of a simpler time before the war tore my world apart.
Emotions swirl within me as I take in the familiar sights and sounds, each one a poignant reminder of the days that are long gone.

There's a sense of longing, a yearning for the innocence and joy that once filled these walls. But under it all, there this profound sadness, a lingering ache perhaps for the loss of that which can never be recreated. I move through the room with a mixture of reverence and nostalgia, tracing my fingers along the furniture, each piece holds a memory of happier times.

Of times where I didn't know what pain was. Times where everything was peaceful.

The sunlight filtering through the curtains casts a warm, golden glow over the room, enveloping me in a sense of peace and quiet.

                        ----
As I immerse myself in the bittersweet embrace of nostalgia, I find myself drawn into a memory I didn't even know I had. It's a scene from my childhood, one that feels both familiar and distant. In the memory, I see myself as a much younger child, perhaps around the age of three, dressed in different colored clothes, not the usual Thundar clothing that most baby wear. My mother cradles me in her arms, her face radiant with love and affection.
Beside her stand my older siblings–my sister, about nine years old, and my brother, at least twelve.

In this fragment of the past, I watch as my mother gently tries to teach me sign language, her hands moving gracefully as she communicates with me. My sister's curious gaze lingers on me, her innocence evident in her questioning expression. "Why can't she speak? Aren't most baby able to speak in her age?" She ask and my mother responds with, "Because my sweet Kaia, she is still learning."

As I approach, drawn inexplicably to the to the child in my mother's arms, I feel a sudden pull, as if I'm being dragged away into darkness. Confusion grips me as I struggle to comprehend the significance of this forgotten memory. Voices call out to me from the could, distant and indistinct, and I fight against the encroaching darkness, desperate to break free.

Finally, with a jolt, I awaken from the depths of my subconscious, my sense reeling as I emerge from the dreamlike world. The voices that had called out to me now take on clarity, and I realize that someone has been calling me name, their concern evident in their tone. Slowly, I open my eyes to the world around me, grappling with the lingering echoes of the memory that had momentary consumed me.

I find myself surrounded by familiar faces. Xander stands beside me, his worry wrenched into every line of his face, while Killian hovers nearby unsure of how to approach me. Despite the lingering haze of my awakening, I manage to muster a small smile for both of them.

"Hey," I whisper, my voice hoarse from disuse. Xander's eyes light up with relief, "Kel, you're awake! We were so worried about you."

Killian reminded silent, his gaze fixed on me with a mixture of sadness and concern.
"Serana I and tried to heal you with our magics but it didn't work at all," he sighs a breath of relief and smiles up at me, "after a days it healed on itself," I reach out and touch his hand to reassure him that I am okay, okay perhaps not 'okay' per say but I'll live. Just another day in the park.

"How long have I been out?" They both look at each other before,
"For about a week," Xander replies, a week–a whole week lost in the depths of sleep.

"Okay....umm where are we?" With a heavy heart, I inquired about our whereabouts and Killian responds solemnly, "Elara, we couldn't say in Sythra anymore." Relief bloods through me at the news, "What about everyone else? Did we get everyone out in time?" I ask worried about everyone else not being able to leave in time.

"Everyone was able to make it out in time." He informs me as I feel the weight of worry that had settled in my chest easing slightly.

"That's good."
"And plus, members of the revolution are already training with the Elara and the Thundar army that was left here in Elara." Xander informs me as I take it all in, "that's great news,"

Xander senses the need for privacy between Killian and me, and with a gentle farewell, he excuses himself to tend to other matters. Alone at last with Killian, I find myself unsure of what to say, the weight of unspoken emotions lingering between us.

"Kel..." Killian starts, his voice tentative.

I offer him a smile, trying to ease the tension between us. "Hey you," his gaze softens as he takes a step closer. "I'm sorry, Kel." He sighs, "I should've protected you better, done better,"

I simply shake my head, this isn't his fault, "It's okay, I'm okay Killian, besides you've always been there for me,"

"How can you say that?" He pulls away from me and turns his back from me trying to hold in his emotions, but somehow I can tell he's in pain, and I caused it, Gods.... "You're not okay, you got hurt and possibly could've died-" "Killian, stop...." I sighed as I continued, "Could've....but I'm not died....yet," I let out a low chuckled as I tried to explain-I don't even know what I'm trying to explain.

He finally turns around and steps closer to me, "But-" "No buts, and plus you shouldn't worry about me, we're not even a thing," he stops in his tracks and we just stare at each other lost in our own emotions.

"I promise you, that I will not lie to you about nothing else, I promise you," he pleads but I only sigh deeply as I feel frustrated, how can he not see that it only starts with one simple lie and than it's more, and more.

"Killian I-I can't-" "Kel please, it's just the mate bond that connects us it's so much deeper, so much more....."

"How do I know it wasn't the bond that influenced everything? Huh? 7 months Killian, 7 whole months and you didn't say anything about it and than you expect me to just up and go with everything? I'm not even from the same tribe as you, I'm of House Thundar, a Queen, I have a duty to my people, to my nation." A sigh escaped me as I feel beaten, not only physically but emotionally and mentally.

"You know that I would never take advantage of you, never." He says as he's voice cracks a little, "I know Killian, I know, I just can't.....I just need time, space perhaps"

He looks hurt and I hate the looking that I am causing him, "Take as much time and space you need Kel, I'll always be here...." he shouldn't wait for me, Gods knows how long that'll be, "Killian-" "It's okay Kel, truly,"

"Wait, just answer this for me," I groan as I get up and walk towards him, "There isn't anymore lies is there?" I need the truth. He places his hand onto my cheek, caressing my skin and I leaned into it, feeling peace and his warmth. "That was it," he says with a sad smile, Gods what have I done? I'm causing him pain and I hate seeing him through this,

I look up at those beautiful dark eyes and give me a smile as I place my hand onto his hand, "Thank you, for being honest with me, and I'm sorry, Killian." He pulls me in and places a small kiss on my forehead.

"I'll forever be here," with that he finally walks out of the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts.