23 | Daddy Issues

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Song: Daddy Issues
Artist's Name: The Neighbourhood

Song: Daddy IssuesArtist's Name: The Neighbourhood

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Elara
"You okay there Elle?"
I don't respond. I'm drunk. I'm veryyy drunk, In fact. But one thing I do know is.. I'm very.. emotional when I'm drunk.

And I tend to think about all my problems. Including my past father figure.

Our family is a topic I think about a lot, when I'm drunk. I kinda seem.. out of place in our family.

I don't even know why I'm thinking about him. He screwed up. He left us. He hurted us. He abandoned us.

A tear manages to escape from my eye. I quickly wipe it off. I didn't want anyone, to know that I'm crying right now.

I know that they would all pity me.
And I don't like being pitied.
—It makes me feel like I'm a helpless child.

"Hey, dad!" I snap my head, to see Natalia talking with her father. "Yeah, everything's fine here. Don't worry so much, anyways I love you so much bye!!"

Tears roll down my eyes, as I listened to their conversation. At least Natalia had a perfect family.

—A perfect dad.

He was always there for her. That's actually the reason why I missed most of my important events.

Mom was always busy with work then, and the bastard also refused to take me to my graduation, my awardings, my proms, and balls.

I close my eyes, leaning my head on the window. If only, if only I had a good dad, maybe life would've been easy, maybe it would have been bearable at least.

A few more tears roll out from my eyes, until we finally reached my house. I get out, not saying a word to them, and quickly heading inside.

No one was there, I guess they were already asleep. I head up to my room, locking my door.

I then slide down it, tears rolling from my eyes. I breakdown, burying my face into my hands.

It was all his fault.
He's an asshole.
He's a bastard to you and Ethan.
He's a bastard to mom.

I cry even more, at the thought of all the things he did to me, and Ethan. I bang my fist on the hard wooden floor.

I just wish I had a dad to let out all my emotions to. I wish I could've had someone to open up to.

I wish I could've had someone who understands me, and who loves me for who I am, and will never judge me.

—I wish I had a Dad.

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