to live for the hope of it all.

Chapter 81

August 19th, 2024

"I don't want to look at anything else no that I saw you,
And I don't want to think of anything else now that I've thought of you..."

Beckett

Jesus Christ I cannot keep my footing.

I play soccer for fucks sake, I even got committed to play D1 at one of the most prestigious schools. So you'd think I would have a sense of control and know how to run, much less fucking walk.

But it appears that seeing my girlfriend in a floral print two piece bikini, with all her blinding features on display, is my undoing.

Kyle invited a small group, mostly just the team and a couple others, over for a going away party before we left at the end of the week. I had been close to passing it up when he called me about it, but he was on speaker phone. And Bailey's face had lightened up at the news that it would be a pool party.

So here we are, because another undoing of mine is Bailey's smile. And my inability to say no to it.

I was relieved that Kyle was true to his word, and it really is a small crowd compared to his past parties. The only downside is that Paige is here, she came with her friend that is dating Jason on the team.

I'd been worried when we first got here, because I know Bailey had her suspicions that we used to be something. Which was far from the truth, Paige and I have only ever talked in passing.

So I think it's fair to say I was a little annoyed whenever she appeared from thin air in front of me. She cut off the angle in which I was openly ogling my girlfriend from where she and Wren laid on the grass. They both had a book in hand, just basking in the sun, and I was tracing every curve of smooth skin on Bailey when Paige spawned.

"Hey, Beckett," Paige smiled. Forcing my eyes to meet hers, I smiled back politely even though I wanted to get back to my previous task.

"Hey, Paige."

"I haven't seen you much this summer, getting ready for Pennbrook?"

Hold eye contact, Beckett.

It's rude to not look at someone when they're talking to you.

"Yeah," I say. "Just soaking in the time at home."

"I get that," she sighs, and then she looks at me expectantly.

Oh shit, she's waiting for me to ask about her.

"How about you?" I offer pathetically, taking a sip from my 4th bottle of beer today.

Another thing to note is that when Bailey is existing, the way she is in that grass right now, my mouth gets unbearably dry. So I've started graciously accepting whatever Caleb puts in my hands at this point.

I may have already taken three shots in the last hour as well, but the only effect they were having on me was intensifying the warmth spreading through my stomach as I watched Bailey from where I stood with the guys.

"Same here, I'm gonna miss it though. It feels like it all went by too fast, so I wish I would have enjoyed it more, you know?"

"I get that," I tell her, but I falter when someone bumps into Paige from behind, and she stumbles forward into my chest.

My bare chest. Because it's a pool party. And God, Bailey was showing so much skin, I needed to even the playing field.

The beer I'm holding fumbles in my hands, and the contents splash all over my front. Paige's hands grip my shoulders to steady herself as she laughs softly, and I take a step back from her at the feeling of her skin on mine.