Waiting For You/ Chanlix

eighteen

Felix knew they were gonna get to the sad part of Minho's journal eventually but he honestly wasn't expecting to get to it so soon, much less how emotional he was going to get about it.

"Hey it's Minho,
I went to the doctor yesterday because I've been feeling pretty bad for a while now. Especially at dance, I loose my breath really easily and my heart beat goes crazy. I thought that it wasn't going to be that serious but I guess it is. I have a heart condition that not many people have survived. I don't think I can even comprehend it yet. I had to quit dance because that's what they doctor told me to do but i'm gonna miss it so much. I'm supposed to get my soulmate tattoo soon but i  don't think i can tell Chan that I'm sick. I don't want to make him sad and i don't want him to treat me any differently if i don't make it. i wish this could happen later so i could at least have some time with Chan as his soulmate but i don't even think i should tell him even if we do have the same tattoo, he deserves more than this."

Felix felt his voice break and tears fall down his cheeks as he finished reading the page.

"I'm sorry, you don't have to read any more of them if you don't want to," Chan said as he pulled Felix in for a hug.

"I just can't imagine- I'm so sorry." Felix said as he held onto Chan even harder. Sure, Chan had explained things to him but only briefly, he didn't know the smaller details of what had happened.

Chan remembered the day that Minho had told him that he quit dance, he was confused but he didn't think that much into it. He knew something was wrong but he didn't think it was as bad as it ended up being.

"I was confused as to why he was acting so weird that day," Chan mumbled.

"Do you wish he would have told you when he found out?"

"Honestly, no. I understand why he didn't. Things would have been a lot different if he did but i wish we could have had some time being soulmates as normal too. He didn't let me see the tattoo until i saw it by accident one day."

"Hey Chan?"

"Hmm?"

"You don't have to say it back but I just want you to know that I love you."

He received silence in response but he wasn't expecting anything more than that. And for now, Felix was okay with that. Now just seemed like the best time to let Chan know that he did, so he said it.