Straight as Guitar Strings

𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝟭𝟱 [𝗲𝗻𝗴𝗹𝗶𝘀𝗵]

I WAS nearly driven mad by that dream, and although two weeks had passed, it was still fresh in my mind. After all, every day after classes, Leo and I kept up our regular routine to build stamina, especially for my lung power and powerful voice. We never missed a jogging session on the athletic field during the golden hour until the sun set. After sunset, just outside the campus, we'd stop by the foot of the overpass for our usual snack of turon and buko juice (which we called BJ for short).

Every time we ate turon and BJ, I'd replay in my mind the scene of me eating his turon, giving him a BJ—yes, as in a blowjob. Ugh! Creamy…

I couldn’t even consider it a nightmare because if I had to award the best dream ever, this one would undoubtedly take the title. It was out of this world! I didn't even realize I was laughing to myself.

"You okay?" Leo asked, his mouth full and the crunch of the turon's wrapper audible as he chewed. I wondered what his lips actually tasted like.

Damn! What was I thinking again?

I didn't answer. I just acted nonchalant, trying to keep quiet and stop laughing.

"Miss, we're paying. We need to go, I have to get this one checked," he said, handing over the money and waiting for the change. He pocketed it and put his arm around me as we walked.

It suddenly dawned on me that he meant me when he said someone needed a check-up. Did he think I was crazy? He even mentioned knowing a good specialist who treats mental issues.

I punched him in the stomach when he least expected it. He doubled over in pain, releasing his grip on my shoulder. Now he was clutching his stomach, rubbing it like a child blowing on hot noodle soup. I often did this to him—not only because I liked to see him hurt after teasing me, but also because it gave me an excuse to feel his six-pack abs.

What’s wrong with touching your best friend’s abs?

Nothing. Nothing, right? I didn’t see any problem with it. It was just touching. Some people even lick them! Duh~

After a few seconds of Leo’s over-the-top acting, clearly pretending to be in pain, I told him to stop. As if he could really be hurt; his abs were rock hard! He pretended to be affected by my taps and punches, but I was sure it didn’t actually hurt him. Maybe just a little?

He stopped his dramatics when his phone rang. Not knowing what message he’d find, he pulled his phone out of his pocket.

As I watched him fiddle with his phone, my own phone chimed. I quickly took it out and eagerly read the incoming message. My eyes scanned the good news so fast I read it twice just to make sure I wasn’t mistaken.

When I looked up at Leo, he was already staring at me, wearing the same expression I had—the same overflowing joy that mirrored my own feelings.

He asked me why I looked like that.

I said, "Nothing, I just got a text message too."

He replied, "Me too! What would yours say?" His excitement was undeniable.

I told him it was a secret and that he should go first.

He agreed easily, always easy to talk to, and said he had received a text message from the adviser of the university's official band. He got in—his audition video was accepted, and he was now one of the replacements for the graduating bassist. Actually, there were two new bassists, but he was the official one, while the other was just a backup.

I was genuinely happy for him and congratulated him on his success.

"I got accepted too!" I shouted joyfully, unable to contain my excitement and pride. I didn’t care if the other students around us were staring.

In my overwhelming happiness, I ran towards Leo to hug him, but he met me halfway and got there first. He lifted me up and spun me around as we both shouted, "We got into the band! We got into the band!" over and over until we were breathless and exhausted.

I told Leo that I was getting dizzy and asked him to put me down. He did so effortlessly, as if I weighed nothing at all, his strong arms showing no signs of strain.

We attracted a lot of attention, with some people even saying, "Sana all." I overheard a whisper I didn’t like. They were gossiping, recognizing Leo as Colleen’s boyfriend, and of course, dragging my name into it. I distinctly heard someone call me a snake.

I’m a tiger! Rawr! Oh, wait, I mean, unicorn... for aesthetic reasons.

"Ignore them, don't bother reacting. Their minds are poisoned by social media, following that Elfin page that only posts fake news," Leo said, holding my hand tightly as he noticed I was about to confront the girls who badmouthed me. I would have really confronted them—maybe even jabbed them with my unicorn horn!

Leo reminded me that what mattered was we were now official members of Libertadlib! That's the official name of Libertad University's band.

His words quickly brought back my joy after the irritation from those passing gossips. I felt that same excitement I had back in senior high when I was chosen as the vocalist for the Euphony band. I wondered how they were doing, especially Grace, who got me into it and encouraged me to audition back then. If it weren't for her, I wouldn't have had the confidence to join things like this now in college.

I wanted to ask Leo...

“Do you want to come over? Let’s celebrate!” I had been debating whether or not to say it, but I was glad I did. I wanted to celebrate this small victory with him.

“Sure! Let’s celebrate!” he replied, without a hint of hesitation, which eased my nerves even more. He smiled at me and ruffled my messy hair, telling me how amazing I was. I thanked him and returned the compliment.

But I paused for a moment when I noticed Leo seemed uneasy and was staring into the distance. His expression quickly changed. I followed his gaze and saw what had caught his attention.

Not far away, I spotted his girlfriend, Colleen. If I wasn't mistaken, she was crying and looked burdened with something heavy. Clearly, something bad had happened, and before I could turn back to look at Leo, he was already running towards the woman he loved.

I remained rooted to the spot, watching how concerned he was as he ran to Colleen. He wiped away the tears streaming down her reddened cheeks, repeatedly asking what had happened and why she was crying, but Colleen didn’t answer.

In that moment, it was as if he no longer saw me. I felt like my presence vanished, like I didn’t exist in this world. I was invisible, so to speak.

He didn’t notice me getting on the bus, either—invisible, right? Even though I looked out the window from my seat on the bus, watching them from a distance, he didn’t see me. I wondered if I ever cried because something terrible happened to me, would I receive the same kind of concern from him?

I pulled the curtain to cover the window, blocking out the sight of Leo repeatedly hugging Colleen, kissing her forehead, and soothing her by gently stroking her back.

As the bus moved and the distance grew, I felt a heavy weight in my chest. I knew I shouldn't feel this way. It was wrong, wrong, wrong, Liam. I knew it was wrong, but why did I still feel it? Why...?

Why did it feel like a massive stone had fallen and crushed my heart? The weight was unbearable; I could hardly breathe.