S2.EP5 The Euclid Alternative*

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The apartment. Leonard enters, drops his keys in the bowl by the door, then collapses onto the settee. Sheldon enters from the bedroom area.

Sheldon: Good morning, Leonard.

Leonard: Uh-huh.

Sheldon: Yeah, we're going to have to stop by Pottery Barn on the way to work, I bought these Star Wars sheets but they turned out to be much too stimulating to be compatible with a good night's sleep. I don't like the way Darth Vader stares at me.

Leonard: I'm not going to work.

Sheldon: Oh, just because your career's been stagnant for a few years, that's no reason to give up.

Leonard: Sheldon, I was up all night using the new free-electron laser for my X-ray diffraction experiment.

Sheldon: Did the laser accidentally burn out your retinas?

Leonard: No.

Sheldon: Then you can drive. Let's go.

Leonard: Didn't I tell you I'd be working nights, and that you'd have to make other arrangements.

Sheldon: You did.

Leonard: And?

Sheldon: I didn't. Let's go.

Leonard: Goodnight, Sheldon.

Sheldon: But how am I going to get to work?

Leonard: Take the bus.

Sheldon: I can't take the bus any more. They don't have seatbelts. And they won't let you lash yourself to the seat with bungee cords.

Leonard: You tried to lash yourself to the seat with bungee cords?

Sheldon: I didn't try, I succeeded. For some reason it alarmed the other passengers and I was asked to de-bus.

Leonard: Oh, you're a big boy, you'll figure it out.

Sheldon: Don't talk to me like I'm a child. Now, take me to return my star wars sheets!

Outside Y/N's apartment.

Sheldon: (Knock, knock, knock) Missy and Y/N, (knock, knock, knock) Missy and Y/N, (knock, knock, knock) Missy and Y/N.

Missy (opening door): Sheldon, do you know what time it is?

Sheldon: Of course I do, My watch is linked to the atomic clock in Boulder, Colorado. It's accurate to one tenth of a second. But as I'm saying this it occurs to me that once again your question may have been rhetorical.

Missy: What do you want Sheldon?

Sheldon: Leonard's asleep.

Missy: Lucky for him. (She begins to close the door.)

Sheldon: No, wait. You have to drive me to work.

Missy: I don't have a car.

She said it obviously.

Sheldon: Oh, you must really get that sorted soon. Can Y/N take me to work?

Missy looked back to the bathroom before turning back to Sheldon.

Missy: He already left, he had to work on something in the lab, so he left early today.

Sheldon: Oh, okay. Well, I leave you to get back to sleep. Goodbye Missy.

Missy: Yeah. Yeah.

Missy closed the door as she saw Y/N get out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist.

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