Rivals

Hope

BRIs POV

i sniffed the white powder that was on the counter, i knew i shouldn't do this its not who i am. But i guess after these pasts years, i've lost myself. And it is who i am.

"Bri.."

I jump up, but let loose once i saw who it was.. it was Anastasia she looked a bit worried but, she kept a smile and i couldn't care less about what was bothering her.

"Yea?" I asked as i rubbed my nose, "I need to speak to you."

"What..?" I made eye contact with her, as she told me her secret.

I had nothing to say or do but to just accept the fact that this time it will never go back to normal, i'll never get the past back

"Do you hate me?" She asked

"No, why would i?" I replied

How could i be mad at my bestfriend for loving her abuser? When i was just as bad as her.. when i wanted to be just be loved.

By tom.

few weeks later

I was coming down from chills, i havent slept next to tom for a bit since i still hold anger towards him. I still dont know much of my mother, and i bet he knows it all.

"What are you thinking about ?" I get startled, tom was behind me as i went to the kitchen to grab some food.

It was just us and bill and stassie, i have no idea where the rest went since i wasn't even allowed to leave my room.

I shrugged, i realized i didnt speak much to him. And i wasnt planning on starting now.

But i had questions, and i knew he had the answer.

"Can you please tell me.. what happened to my mother." I asked avoiding eye contact

"Nothing. Im not sure, why?" He responds back to me and it infuriates me, i know he knows what happened.. he has to be behind it.

"Please.. i just want the truth i have no idea on whats going on anymore. I just want you to tell me... what is going on? Why did you choose me? Why me?"

"Ask your brother." He responds back very quickly yet it sounded like he was starting to get angry.. of course.

My heart dropped when i heard this, how does he know who my brother is.. when even i dont know him. I dont know much about him i should say. At times, i even forget his name.. im never sure what it could be.

"Look please.. just tell me what you want from me and let me go.." i said softly

"You.. no. I can't tell you." He said.

"I don't want you to leave.." he said softly, almost hard to hear.

It made me feel .. relieved. I know, its crazy to say but i was relieved.

"I could've loved you, Tom. But you make it hard to. "

He stared at me for a few seconds, it was awkward as we never really had any alone conversations.. not this intimate.

I thought i was strong, i thought i could leave any toxic abusive situation i was in but being kidnapped, and all this happening to me made me realize how weak.. i can be.

"Fuck! What the fuck is wrong with you?!" He snapped at me, it startled me causing me to stumble a bit backwards, i looked at him in fear yet confused..

The last thing i needed or wanted was a man yelling at me, it brings bad memories

"You.. You're so fucking spoiled. Fuck you! Fuck you bri, you're so stuck in the past guess fucking what you wont go back there at all, you can escape and leave and try to convince yourself that everything is all fucking better for you but there is nobody there for you anymore. I gave you a big fucking house, a new wardrobe, fucking everything!" He screamed at me

He got closer to me, grabbing my arm squeezing it and looking at me in the face.

I am sick of fighting, so instead i just breakdown.
God why am i so fucking weak, so many thoughts were going through my head.. yet i couldn't find any words to defend myself.... Maybe i realized there was nothing else for me to defend.

He was right, nobody and nothing is there for me anymore

"You think you kidnapping me, and coercing me moving me to a different place gives you authority to treat me like this???" I finally yelled back at him

"Shut the fuck up! Im sick of you! All your fucking complaining, i gave you what others couldn't give you. Fuck off, i dont need your love." He grabs my face and squeezes it, slamming it onto the wall

Tears were flowing down, but i still managed to look at him. He looked so angry yet so hurt.. maybe he did this because everyone is leaving him slowly.. im not sure.

"No, Fuck you tom." I said back with my voice cracking,

He slaps me so hard my nose starts dripping blood and my ears ringed,

every time i tell myself i can love him he shows me millions of reasons why i shouldn't

I was trying to tell myself to get up, do something, defend yourself, fight back, kill him and get it all over with..

But i couldn't, i couldn't stand.. i couldn't move, i was frozen.

He stared at me for a few seconds before walking away, leaving me alone in the kitchen floor.

I finally got little strength to go and get some paper towels for my nose.. to calm down the bleeding, i saw my reflection in the window

I was avoiding mirrors but god.. i dont recognize myself anymore.

There was no point in escaping.. i had no motivation, i had no strength and no hope. This was my life now, ill have to adjust.