A Tale of Wretched Occurrences: The Beginning

𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓕𝓲𝓯𝓽𝓮𝓮𝓷

"Shotgun." Count Olaf pushes past you and your siblings to make it to the car first. Confused, Uncle Monty opens the door for him, and Olaf climbs in without saying thank you.

"Hurry up," he says. "Tick-tock. Don't want to miss the previews. And all of the excessive commercials."

Uncle Monty helps you all climb into the back, then shuts the door and walks around the car to get into the driver's seat. Count Olaf doesn't waste a second, immediately pulling out a knife.

"We don't know what you're up to, but we will find out." Violet tells him.

"If anything happens to me or my sisters, you'll never get your hands on the Baudelaire fortune," Klaus warns.

Count Olaf returns to his normal voice. "If I wanted to harm you, orphan, your blood would be streaming out of this car like a waterfall. No, I am not going to harm a hair on any Baudelaire head. At least, not on purpose." He turns around to look at you. "But accidents happen all the time, don't they?"

Thankfully, Uncle Monty opens his door and climbs into his seat. Count Olaf quickly slides the knife into his jacket and resumes his Stephano accent. "And that is when I said to him, 'The frog is the greatest reptile known to man.'"

"Frogs are amphibians," you and Klaus say together.

"What?" Count Olaf asks.

Uncle Monty starts the car. "Stephano, where did you study herpetology?"

"I don't know anything about mouth sores." Count Olaf quickly changes the subject by turning on the radio. "Oh! I love this song!" he shouts, barely audible over the loud music.

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As you walk up to the ticket booth, an old woman is chatting with the ticket seller. Behind the seller, you see that tonight's movie is called Zombies in the Snow.

"Have you ever heard of that film?" you ask Klaus.

"No," he admits. "But, Dr. Montgomery did say we'd see lots of things we've never seen before. I guess that included movies."

The old woman walks away, and Uncle Monty walks up to the booth.

"Dr. Montgomery!" the ticket seller greets, surprised.

"Hello, old chap," Monty responds cheerfully. He pulls some money from his pocket, slapping it onto the counter. "Two adults and four children, please."

The seller prints out the tickets. "I'm giving you the Verified Film Discount," he informs Uncle Monty.

"Ah, lovely." Uncle Monty smiles as the seller hands him the tickets.

"Enjoy the show!" the ticket seller calls as you walk into the theater.

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Your nostrils immediately fill with the scent of buttery, salty popcorn. Despite just having dinner, you can't help but crave some. It seems Count Olaf has the same idea, because he suggests: "Hey, I'll get popcorn for me- for all of us. My treat."

"Really? You don't have to do that," Uncle Monty says.

"No, go, go ahead. Take a seat. I'll bring it to you." Count Olaf waves you away.

You hate the idea of Count Olaf being alone with something you're going to eat, but Uncle Monty is already walking away.

"Come along, children," he encourages.

You hesitate for a second before following him.

Uncle Monty pushes open the theater doors. "7th row, right in the center. That is the best place."