A Pet for the Dragons

39.

RADROX

I lingered in the shadows because that was my place. I was one among them. Being a red-scaled dragon meant I spent most of my time in the shadows because I was an anomaly, a disgrace.

I'd proven the same with my actions now.

I waited in an inconspicuous place outside the western tower for Zorge or Ivret. I wanted to know how Arika was doing.

The shock from what had happened still infected me, but the guilt and shame had been quick to swallow me. I didn't know what had happened to Arika and from where she was bleeding, but I knew one thing— it was my fault.

It had to be me.

Whatever I touched either broke, tarnished or lost its charm. I touched Arika, and she got hurt somehow.

Shame. I was drowning in immense shame to know that I'd caused harm to a female.

Even though that had never been my intention, all I wanted was to somehow extract information from her, but Arika turned the matter around, and I ended up between her legs... and she got hurt.

I hurt her.

The guilt pricked every part of my skin. I loathed myself enough already, but knowing that I somehow hurt Arika made me want to fling myself in the furnace and end everything. I'd proven that the colour of my scales precisely defined me.

The worst string came from my brother, Zorge. I'll never forget how disappointed he looked in me. He was ashamed to be my brother. I was ashamed of myself, but instead of sitting around and drowning in guilt, I wanted to do something... anything to make myself feel better.

I knew it was selfish, but I wanted to try to fix the mess I made. However, the guilt and shame had me hiding in my dungeon. It'd taken me a lot of courage and audacity to be out here waiting for Zorge or Ivret to know how Arika was.

I considered returning to my dungeon and hiding there forever, but I waited in the shadows. I had to do this. I couldn't hide forever. I wanted to try to save this, to try to be better.

But it was hard to be better when others disregarded you just because of the colour of your scales. I'd tried to be patient and show people that I wasn't like the red dragons... but I proved that I was no different.

I hadn't been able to find peace for a single second ever since I woke up in my dungeon after Ivret knocked me out. I was now more aware of my redness. I had acted like a red dragon— mad and reckless.

It angered me. I was angry at myself for even thinking that I could have a female for myself. I was angry at myself for even wanting a female for myself, to desire a female, even though it was evident that no female would ever want me because of my red scales and the ugly scars.

I clenched my jaw and stopped thinking about females. I wasn't entitled to any of them anymore. But I wanted to know what happened to Arika. It was bothering me deeply not to know how she was doing.

I kept waiting in the shadow, and soon, I heard footsteps climbing down the spiralling stairs of the western tower. I smelled Ivret and stepped out, not caring if he'd start throwing punches at me again. I was willing to withstand a few punches, and some mean words if I got to know if Arika was alright.

As soon as Ivret saw me, his eyes flashed with rage. The calm, peaceful demur he always maintained evaporated in the blink of an eye.

"What are you doing here?" He hissed at me, looking tense. He took an attack stance, letting me know that he wouldn't mind beating me again if things came to that.

"How's she?" I asked immediately without wasting a second because it had made me restless.

"You dare come here and enquire about her after you hurt her!" Ivret hissed. I noticed he was holding a bowl, which shattered due to his rage. "Get out of here before I clip your wings and shun you forever like it should've been done a long time ago,"

His words stung me like a tight slap to my face. I'd have attacked him in another situation for saying such awful things to me, but I clenched and unclenched my fists to hold myself back. I needed to maintain my calm. I'd already made the case worse for myself. Another wrong move would cement that I was no different than the other red dragons and deserved to have my wings clipped and shunned forever.

"Ivret," I started. "I want to know what happened to her. I didn't mean to hurt her. I want to make this right—"

"She's been unconscious for more than a day and bleeding endlessly! How are you going to make this right? Tell me!" Ivret's growl reverberated through the whole western tower, making the loose bricks in the wall quiver.

His words fuelled my guilt and shame. I should've been more careful with Arika because humans are fragile, but I went too hard on her, and she got hurt. Knowing that I could've prevented this by being more prudent made me loathe myself even more. I got too greedy to pay attention to her well-being.

"I'm ashamed for what I did," I told Ivret, "But I want to do something to make this right,"

"Oh yeah?" Zorge spoke from the top of the stairs. I hadn't noticed his arrival. Ivret's growl must've brought him down here. He crossed his arms on his chest and glared at me. "You want to make this right?"

"Yes," I hissed. "Tell me what I need to do to make this right," I demanded. All I needed was another chance. I'd show it to them then that I wasn't like the other red dragons. That I was Radrox, the most honourable red dragon.

"You'll make this right by getting out of here and staying the fuck away from her," Zorge growled. Ivret gave an approving grunt and glared at me fiercely.

"Alright," I swallowed. "I'll stay away." If that was going to make it right, then I was willing to do it, but a part of me ached for not seeing Arika again. I wanted to see her myself. I wanted to ensure that she was alright. "But can I—"

"No," Ivret and Zogre growled together.

"Okay," I muttered, turned around and walked away, more ashamed than ever. 

~

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