Don't leave me. not again.
you know I can help you if you let me;
just like how you helped keep my head above water
all those years ago.
I don't care if you aren't the person you want to be; because I know you can become whoever you want and I want to be there
by your side
I want to be with you in your trial & error
successes & failures
whatever you go through
I will be there.
I want to be there.
and I love who you were, who you are, and whoever you will be & you know that.
I know you know that.
He tells me the same thing over and over and over and
in the back of my brain
It has become permanent
He thinks I deserve better; that I need self-respect; that he hopes I find someone who loves me how I want to be loved; and that he doesn't want to hurt me
And I reply that he is all that I want, and he will always be
That I would wait forever
Until a meteorite comes & flushes us out
In the chaos
Of the end of the world
He would be the one I'd look for.
And he doesn't reply
He says he's sorry
And he doesn't speak to me again until he tells me
He loves me
And he is a fool
And we go into another loop.
He thinks I am made of paper
He thinks that not replying for two months will send me into some kind of spiral I will never get out of and
Although it would've
I have become hardened to whatever his self-destructive habits throw at me
He won't let me get near him
Love him
Care for him
But I don't want to give up.
//Look into your heart,
Yes, you.
Don't think about anything; not if you're hurting me, or if you hate yourself, or about any other worst-case scenario you come up with.
Now that there's nothing else, but me and what we truly feel
What do you really want?
