WEIGHT OF THE WORLD ↠ Mazikeen [2]

28 | ALL IN

IZZY WASN'T SURE WHERE SHE FOUND THE COURAGE to enter Dan's home, knowing everything would just dig up more bittersweet memories of the man, but when Mazikeen had informed her that she was going to help Amenadiel and Linda pack up his things, she insisted on going along. She needed the distraction after a terrible 8 hours of barely sleeping, her panic attack still fresh on her mind and the thought of Dan in Hell tormenting her, making her think she was already there herself. She already knew her hell loop was going to be him dying in her arms over and over again, giving her some willingness to live, because anything was better than the fate she had been dealt.

Dan's apartment was full of boxes hiding his clothes and knick-knacks, as well as books and other mementos he had kept around the place. Izzy had taken it upon herself to go through the half-empty bookshelf, while Maze tidied up the rest of his clothes. She supposed that in some way it was meant to be cathartic, but the wound his loss had torn open was still too sore, not yet able to heal. She had never lost anyone, and she hadn't been prepared for the ache it would cause. It made her think about her dad, too, but knowing she was in a state of complete fragility right now, she didn't want to dwell on the matter or even consider reconnecting with Spencer.

As Izzy grabbed another book from the shelf, something slipped from between the pages and fell onto the floor. With a curious look, she crouched down to pick it up, realizing it was a small Polaroid. When she turned the photo around, she came face to face with herself – it was a picture of her and Dan, with her leaning her head on his shoulder and him kissing the top of her head. She vaguely remembered Benjamin snapping the photo some years ago, but she hadn't clung onto the memory the same way Dan clearly had. She smiled wistfully at the photo and pressed it against her chest before tucking it into her pocket. She didn't have much of anything physical to remember Dan by, so she was going to cherish it for the rest of her days.

Izzy was snapped out of her thoughts when she heard a sob, and turning around, she saw Maze sitting on the back of Dan's couch, tightly clinging onto one of his shirts while crying. Immediately emotional herself, Isadora snuck over to Mazikeen and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, trying to bring comfort to the woman who had done so much for her in the past couple of days.

"It's the t-shirt that Dan had to steal from Chloe after I knocked him out and dumped him naked at her house", Maze cried out, and through her own tears, Izzy managed a chuckle at the memory. Maze loved telling that story, and it always made Izzy laugh, the thought of Dan in a pink tracksuit more than amusing. "I still... I still don't know how he fit his stupid ass in this thing", she added with a wail, and nodding, Izzy kissed Maze's cheek, tasting the salt of her tears.

Taking Maze's hand, Linda sighed. "It's true, sometimes when you care about people... you have to go through pain and loss. But that's the price of joy", the therapist shared her wisdom. Izzy frowned – Maze had already lost her mother, even if she had hated her, and now Dan... Especially with a soul, it had to feel terrible for a demon who wasn't used to experiencing emotions.