Big Bang Theory (Missy Cooper X Male Reader X Paige Swanson )

S3.EP15 The Large Hadron Collision

Y/N and Missy were sitting down on the couch as Y/N was looking over his computer.

Y/N: That's it. The last person finally accepted the invitation. My grandma finally RSVP'd a yes.

Missy: Why didn't you call her?

Y/N: I wanted to this way so it would get lost in her emails.

Missy: Is that why you sent it to her work email?

Y/N: Yep.

Missy: You know you can try to know her better and bond, she's trying to change.

Y/N: Yeah, I doubt that. Also, somehow an old friend of mine found out we're getting married and invited himself.

Missy: Who?

Y/N: Wil Wheaton.

Missy: Where I have heard that name before?

Y/N: He's Sheldon's mortal enemy.

Missy: Do you know how little that narrows it down?

Y/N: Fair enough. He's a famous actor from the Star Trek Next Generation series and Stand by Me.

Missy: Oh, Gordie.

Y/N: Yeah, that's the one. Now, we need to look at wedding venues.

Missy: You got my list?

Y/N: Yep. Are you sure you don't want to come with me tomorrow?

Missy: No, I got work. And the wedding date is only three months away and we're behind schedule.

Y/N: How much work do you have, you're my assistant and I'm not even their anymore?

Missy: There's still hundreds of emails, I have to sort through, I have to fight people off from laying claim to your lab and office, stop people from borrowing your equipment and have to deal with people asking when you're coming back.

Y/N: It sounds like a pain in the arse.

The university cafeteria.

Howard (on the phone): Yeah, I miss you, too, sweetie. Listen, I got to go, but I'll see you tonight? Okay. Bye-bye. Yeah, bye-bye. No, you hang up first. Hello?

Raj: Dude, I'm glad you finally got a girlfriend, but do you have to do all that lovey-dovey stuff in front of those of us who don't?

Sheldon: Actually, he might have to. There's an economic concept known as a positional good in which an object is only valued by the possessor because it's not possessed by others. The term was coined in 1976 by economist Fred Hirsch to replace the more colloquial, but less precise neener-neener.

Howard: That's not true. My happiness is not dependent on my best friend being miserable and alone.

Raj: Thank you.

Howard: Although, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't a little bit of a perk.

Leonard: Who's miserable and alone?

Raj: Me.

Leonard: Oh. I used to be like that. Then I got a girlfriend.

Sheldon: In pre-1976 terms, neener-neener.

Leonard: Hey, what are you and Bernadette doing for your first Valentine's Day?

Howard: Yeah, I am pulling out all the stops. There's a $39.95 lover's special at P.F. Chang's. Egg rolls, dumplings, bottomless wok, and you get your picture taken on the big marble horse out front.

Sheldon: Given that Saint Valentine was a third century Roman priest who was stoned and beheaded, wouldn't a more appropriate celebration of the evening be taking one's steady gal to witness a brutal murder?