‎‧₊˚✿[ℓιттℓє ωση∂єяѕ]✿˚₊‧ 「𝐃𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐲/𝐉𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐚𝐥」

My depression is cured bitches😍

Y'all, this just in my depression has been cured 🙏 (/j)

No but um, i'm definitely both less depressed and more depressed because of this stupid realisation of "there's worse in the world". Like I mean, obviously i have bad things going on, but in the end, there are worse what makes me so special?

Genuinely speaking right, there are crimes being committed, sick people out there doing disgusting things and acts and getting away with it for years..

And i'm busy sobbing because, what? Life sucks?

I feel more sad because of these facts going on, but i feel better as well because i'm jut being more grateful about the life I have.

I could have things so much worse.

I always wish to be dead, but who knows.. it might not be me to be killing myself.. i might just get into a taxi/cab(whatever) and find myself having the most pleasant time of my life.. just to then be chocked, stabbed, and thrown into a trash bag to rot away in a forest somewhere never to be found again..

I'm always trying to kill myself, but there are others that succeed and went through so much more in their life, and now have grieving family or friends mourning for their life, wishing it was them, wishing they noticed sooner, wishing they could have tried something to change it all.

...

I'm not downplaying my own problems, I'm simply saying that i know that there is far worse things in life for me to be so worried, sad and worked up over my own problems.

My dad is a massive dick, mentally abusive and at some points physically abuse.. but at least he isn't trying to kill me, at least he hasn't harmed me to a degree, at least at some points in life he can be nice and at least i have a father..

My mum is.. alright, manipulative at times and whatever but at least she cares about me enough, at least she's still alive and (somewhat) healthy, at least i know that i can talk to her about some of my issues (when she's in a decent mood)

My siblings are strange and indifferent, but hey, i have siblings that can care about me, i can care about them. at least I still have them around and know that they will be alright for a long time to come.

You know? I mean..

Yeah.

(I've been watching too much true crime recently :'))