Linger in love

(40) long awaited

"Lord Debling, it is lovely to see you again" Pen walked in with courage. She did not want the gentleman to get the wrong idea.

"You as well" he nodded "I have brought you something"

He passed her a package. It was wrapped very prettily with a piece of lavender around the twine. It was a book describing the water route through the northern Canada. He loved that she had an interest in reading. Her fingers looked along the edging.

Reading aloud to herself "The Fables of the northwest passage" It was to be extremely difficult and treacherous, to be sure. Many men have been lost at sea at the very expedition. Although fame and respect can be found at the end. Lord Debling loves the natural beauty of the world. He did not wish for fame or recognition. He only wished for adventure and wonders the land has to offer.

"This is wonderful. Thank you" she smoothed the brown leather binding, and held it close to her chest.

He smiled and sat beside her "Have you thought any more about our last discussion?"

"I have. I am very flattered Lord Debling and I would think any woman would be excited to call you their husband. Unfortunately it is not just because of the grief. I have found someone who cares for me . I would thought it impossible. Since Tommy. I apologise if you believe I have pulled your strings, it was truly not my intent"

"Not at all. I find your candour refreshing and no offer was made" he was disappointed, but a Lady who new her own mind was most admirable "You are are a very smart lady and he is a lucky man, to be sure"

"I will make my leave" His soft voice took her by surprise. He stood up. A hint of sadness in his eyes "I hope you have a great life and all you desire Lady Fairaway"

"And you. Lord Debling" she felt compelled to remind him "You are a remarkable man. Don't loose hope, there is always more interest to be had"

Penelope felt relief as he left but also sadness, his confident face lines seem to contort a little. This man showed respect for her and would have taken her hand even though she was pregnant. She gave a large sigh. Hoping the Lord will find someone perfect for himself.

She was surprised when she made her way back to the small dining room and Colin was still there. The thought crossed her mind, that he may leave, more confused than he was when he entered her home.

"You did not leave" her eyebrows twerked.

"I did not" the last thing she said to him was that she did not know what to do. He couldn't quite follow her or leave until he knew what she meant. "Is Lord Debling..?"

"He is gone"

"Ah" the suspense was killing him. "So, what will it be?"

A knock at the door.

Varley looked up to her "Sorry to intrude, but you have recieved an urgent letter from Fairaway house"

Pen opened the letter. He watched as she traced the writing. "I am needed back home. Colin, I am sorry but this will not wait. Is the Viscount Bridgerton home?"

"Yes but Pen, would you like me to assist you?"

"That is kind, but it is your brother I need. Can you ask him to meet me outside his home in 20mins, he will need to accompany me to Fairaway house. He may bring Kate if he so chooses"

Why can Kate go, but not him. He felt utterly useless. More so as he didn't have the foggiest what had happened.

"Of course Pen. Would you like me to travel with you?"

"There is no need, Colin" she eyed the door "Please fetch your brother, I assure you, I will be gone a day, possibly two"

Colin had to force himself to leave her. When he looked back. She was looking at the letter again intently. She hadn't even looked at him leave. As the door closed with a click. She realised he had left.

Pen waited outside the Bridgerton home, exactly 20minutes later.

Anthony came rushing out with Kate.

"Penelope, what is so urgent?"

"I need your help" she passed Anthony the letter. He looked at her confused "Why me?"

"You alone handled all the affairs after your father's death, did you not?"

"I did, but I don't know why you need me there"

"Viscount Bridgerton. I do not know what to do. I was hoping that you could understand and then explain to me in laments terms how to resolve this issue" Anthony understood,

"I am sorry to ask. But I have no male relative and you are the closest thing I have to a brother"

Anthony's wince turned into a smile, he could see her confidence that he alone, knew what to do and that she thought of him as a brother. Never in a million years could he foresee that revelation.

"Flattery gets you everywhere Lady Fairaway" Pen smiled and looked to Kate "If you choose to come I will be happy, but you are growing faster by the day and I don't want you to feel overwhelmed"

Kate squeezed her hand "Wherever Anthony goes, I will follow and it is always pleasant to have another lady to talk to"

That was good enough for Pen. They climbed into their carriage and left.

Colin stood at his bedroom window, looking outside his home as the carriage made its departure. A large lump in his throat started to form. He wanted to be with Pen, every moment of everyday. Just her leaving Mayfair felt like he was loosing her all over again.

Why could he not just be honest and let the words known. He is a confident, popular man, surely he can muster up the right words. For goodness sake.

Why the fuck did I not tell her. He could hear his self conscious say the words 'I. Love. You. But what was the point. She was gone.