Beyond Words

Baby

🎶Aararaari raaro

Adaa POV

One can understand women's pain during pregnancy, because they can be seen or felt by people far from us, but Father? Have you ever thought about what runs in a father's brain? I have always known that the baby and father share a connection that's beyond science, but watching Vishu I have seen a husband become a father.

Dev had already made him a father in every sense, but we never experienced pregnancy, which might have helped us understand how to be better parents. I have connected with both of my babies by heart; I carried one in my womb for a limited time and will carry them in my heart for a lifetime.

But he, he always carried them in his brain, on his shoulder, showed them the world, while they became his. Being a father is not easy, he gets all the hard feelings, in exchange for their future. His hidden emotions make him heartless for them. His care-filled words are underlaid by an anger-filled voice making him insensitive.

"I will call Nidhi", kissing the back of my palm he went out of the room, returning the next moment with Nidhi.
"It's been an hour and a half, so let me check you", she put on her gloves and bent down to my vagina. Another thing that no one prepares you for in pregnancy, is that you be ok with people watching your vagina, no offense it's their profession. 

"yeah, we should start.", she turned to Vishrut from me and continued "You ready?", to which he nodded taking a deep breath.

An hour had passed with me trying to push my little monster, my low screams, and my heavy breathing. I feel so exhausted, the energy in my body is drained out but the pain and contractions in my lower body feel so intense. 

At this point in time, the only feel that's making me feel alive is the pain, and determination to push her out so that she becomes a part of our family, this world. 
"Cupcake, look here", Vishrut rubbed his thumb on my cheek, I was forcefully opening my eyes, against their protest to be closed and submit into the darkness, rest.

 "Just a few more pushes, and all the love we shared all these come into our hands, our baby Adaa. You can do this right." just the thought of holding my baby in my hands keeps me going. 
After a push, Nidhi said that she could see the head of the baby, and I just needed another push.
 "Ah...", that was the loudest of all the screams, but I couldn't focus on my throat, because all I could focus on was the pain that was making all my senses numb.

The pain, of being shredded alive. the pain that's equal to bones breaking, the pain that makes you want to die. To be more precise it feels like your favorite person's stab in your heart. I was emotional mine was physical. 

Vishu kissed my forehead and muttered a "thank you and I love you" before going to the baby to cut her umbilical cord. Somehow it feels weird, the life that had grown in you left you, and you can feel your stomach flat again, like it was never before, Hallow. The thread that bound you was cut off, if somehow makes you feel sad, so so sad, like she left you with a part of her inside your heart.

She was placed in my arms, she felt so tiny, her eyes, nose, lips, ears, fingers, and hands. Oh god! My baby is so small, fragile, and innocent. The waterworks in her eyes stopped when she was placed in my arms and mine started.

I looked up at Vishu just to his eyes similar to mine, while his hands stroked the babies hand. 
"Our baby", He muttered and kissed me. Then the baby was taken to do the tests, and fresh up. I slept holding Vishrut's hand in a tight grip, as if he would fly away like a kite if I left him. They cleaned me before they brought back the baby.

"I will call them", Vishu went out while I should her to my heart. 
"You know baby, your whole family is waiting outside for you, especially your father and brother." she tried to open her eyes, but her lips parted as a yawn escaped her lips. She looked so cute doing that.