Beyond Words

10.Dance

Vishrut POV

I love Piya and I don't think I will ever love another. No matter how much I tried to move on she just pops up in front of me, she is there with me in my every activity. Her thoughts became my oxygen, reason to breathe, sanity, and survival. 

The fear of not being able to love another as much as they deserve makes me stay single. I am afraid that I can't give her what she wants. But the woman beside me questioned my sanity and gave me new hopes which I know will crash someday.

 And she always evokes me and reminds me of her, her eyes, smell, her smile, her voice and everything. Before she could occupy my whole self I had to move away. To move away I have to do this. After talking with my dad I concluded that I was sexually frustrated and I badly needed to get laid. When my brain was thinking of all the probabilities of her accepting my proposal I could feel her twisting and turning in bed. "can't sleep?" I asked turning to her. 

When she shared her reason for not being able to sleep I could see that she felt embarrassed it's all written on her face. Before she could feel much more embarrassed I told her to keep her leg on me. The moment her leg touched mine I lost my last cell of sanity and pulled her to me.

 Her face in my neck and our bodies touching each other. When she tilted her face to me eyes shone with the dim light from the window falling on them. Before doing something and making her feel uncomfortable I should ask her. The moment I started talking I lost, my brain and started rambling the moment her finger touched my lips they froze.

 But words that left her mouth made me feel a bit calm. Honestly, I expected her to be hella angry.  I can give her time as much as she wants if the answer is yes, oh god let it be yes, I beg you. With high hopes of a positive answer, I drifted to sleep with her in my arms.

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My morning view made me coo. She hugged me like Kola hugs a tree, with her face pressed against my chest, her cheeks squeed forming a pout. My phone started ringing flashing Ram's name on display, I quickly grabbed it before she could wake up. I made myself free from her and went to the balcony to answer the call. "yeah... ", I answered the call.

"Did you two wake up? we have to go to Leela's house for rituals. You remember?"

"I remember. Give us half an hour we will be down", I hung up and returned to the bedroom only to meet an empty bed. I heard noises from the bathroom and waited for her to come out. After a while, she came out with a white sharara kurti. I made my way inside as soon as she came out. After yesterday I don't want to embarrass myself anymore. By the time I came out, she was ready. She always leaves me awestruck, and the credit goes to jhumkas and bindi. 

"Shall we?", she asked as soon as she saw me.

"Yeah"

Ram's family members are amiable. We already know each other so it's not so awkward. Everyone becomes busy as today is reception and we have to complete the ritual before that. It's a ritual where the groom sues black beads without a needle.  And this is worn by the bride. It is done at the bride's house. 

As soon as the ritual was completed we returned to Ram's house, as we had to get ready for reception. Such a hectic day the whole day went in a snap.  my day went in traveling, helping them, then traveling again. But the ritual was fun. Soon we found ourselves involved in getting ready for the reception. 

We reached the reception venue and everyone was already present waiting for the couple. The ceremony continued, and one by one came onto the stage to wish the couple for their lovely journey ahead. 

I don't how excited they are about this journey but I am crazy to see them together, happy. I always wanted my life to be like them. if not mine at least I get to see them happy. I know they will get along no matter what life throws at them.

The reception continued, and everyone started to dance. Slowly dragging the main couple down. the crowd fell silent as they started to dance. Being in each other's arms, lost in each other eyes, molding into one. 

I don't when but I drifted into an imagination. And it had Adaa in my arms, her captivating eyes looking into my soul, her enchanting smile making me haze, her slender neck shining under the moonlight, her toned arms wrapped around mine, her smile, her waist that just fit right in my arms, her body moving along with mine. It felt so surreal like a dream coming true. 

It oddly felt at home. I am afraid to acknowledge the feelings, I just want to run away from them as far as I can. It's funny to say but when someone says I love you and shows emotions towards me I just want to run away. They scare me. In some or other way it reminds me of Piya and the feeling that she is gone because of me just makes everything worse. and feel like I don't deserve to move on. The feelings that are coming because of her I am afraid.

These feelings make me feel like am floating above the ocean just to be drawn back by her enchanting eyes. I feel like a deer caught in headlights, captivated by the beautiful light, willing to lose herself for the mesmerizing lights known by the fact that it takes her life, but couldn't care for herself anymore. The lights enticed her and she fell for it, completely losing herself. 

I can't let her emotionally affect me. I have to stop these thoughts. And I have only option to let that happen.

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