Welp it's been a week since I started dating my bf
He's 17 (don't judge...) im pretty sure when he turns 18 we'll either keep the relationship a secret or be friends with benefits...idk he doesn't till like early april so why am i worrying abt it..
Anyways I promised myself right after making it official that I won't get attached too quickly and not be vulnerable till we've been dating for at least 3 months (idk if it'll even go that far we'll see what the future shall hold for me)
but here's the problem...
I'm already too attached to him
Idk, it feels like when I'm texting him, my mood instantly lightenes up, whatever i was mad or sad and shit. Time seems to go fast and we could be talking abt any game or anime or whatev, and then when he leaves, I feel sad and sometimes numb, while time goes slow and i keep looking back and forth to see if he was online and he wasn't.
In the recent nights, I feel like I can be safe with him..he makes me feel safe. Which I've never felt before, and I'm actually questioning what'd i do to deserve someone like him
(okay atp im just admiring my bf lemme stop) Now everytime he goes offline, i keep telling myself 'he doesn't truly love me...he'll find someone else who's probably prettier than me and fall inlove with her instead'
...
idk im a mess ;-; one minute i wanted to not be attached, but i already am too attached to him and i dont want him to break up with me out of the blue, even though he promised that he'll never dump me....i dont believe that..but we'll see as time continues to go on...
YOU ARE READING
Venting (cause why not)
RandomWelcome to my venting book! U don't have to read, it's actually pretty pointless if u do, it's just me talking abt my issues, what im struggling with, etc etc. Also I can't promise u that I'm not going to delete the book Enjoy!
