𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐋 𝐅𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃

36

Song:
i'm god- clams casino
slowed

LEENA

"I just feel so awful, Leena. You were dealing with all of that by yourself. And then with Angel..." Lilith's voice trails off, her eyes clouded with guilt and sadness as her face mirrors the weight of her emotions.

This right here-this is exactly what I had dreaded. The pity-filled looks, the heavy sighs, the somber glances. It was the very reason I hadn't confided in them from the start. I didn't want to be the girl everyone felt sorry for, the one they whispered about with sad eyes and heavy hearts.

In a way, I guess that makes me a bit of a hypocrite. After all, I had done the exact same thing to Angel when he finally opened up and told me the truth.

I remembered the heavy knot of guilt twisting in my stomach, the overwhelming wave of sorrow I felt for him. So, how could I fault my friends for reacting the same way? It wouldn't be fair to blame them for the sadness in their eyes or the heaviness in their hearts when I had felt every bit of that same burden myself.

Sometimes, empathy looks a lot like pity, and it's not always easy to tell where one ends and the other begins.

"It's okay, Lilith," I say softly, offering a small, reassuring smile. "Really, it is. It still hurts, but I've learned how to manage the pain." My voice falters for a moment, the weight of my own words pressing on my chest. "There are times when it gets a little overwhelming, though."

I let out a sigh, the memories washing over me like a tide I couldn't hold back. I think of the countless days I spent sitting by my mother's gravestone, the way the cold stone felt beneath my fingertips as I traced her name, whispering words into the wind that I wished she could hear.

The ache of longing, so sharp it felt like it might tear me apart, had often reduced me to tears. There were days I'd sat there for hours, the silence my only company, letting my grief pour out in a way I couldn't share with anyone else.

I feel my throat tighten but force myself to meet Lilith's eyes. "Sometimes, it feels like I'm drowning in it," I admit quietly, my honesty hanging heavily between us. "But I'm getting better at coming up for air."

Reyna moves across the bed, wrapping her arms around me and pulling me into a warm embrace, holding me firmly against her chest. "If you ever need to talk, we're always here for you," she murmurs gently, her voice soft with sincerity.

Her hand moves in slow, comforting circles on my back, a soothing gesture that melts away a fraction of the weight pressing on my heart.

A warm smile spreads across my face, the genuine gratitude filling me from head to toe.

Lilith doesn't hesitate for a moment, launching herself towards us with excitement. Without warning, she pulls both Reyna and me into a tight embrace, her arms wrapping around us both in a spontaneous gesture.

"Group hug!" she announces, her voice filled with playful energy. Her enthusiasm is infectious, and I can't help but chuckle softly as I return the hug, feeling the comfort of their presence surrounding me.

We found ourselves in Lilith's room, a place I had never been before, despite knowing her for months.

Earlier that day, she had invited us over during school hours, and without a second thought, I had eagerly accepted the invitation. It was a bit surprising, really, considering how close we'd become over time, yet somehow, we'd never had the chance to hang out at her place before.

As I looked around the room, taking in the details, I realized just how much of a new experience this was for me, and it made me feel a little more connected to her.