La Douleur Exquise // Muke {Completed}

Ivre

"I'm drunk Mikey," Luke giggled, pulling himself back in from where he'd been half hanging out the passenger window of Michael's car, claiming he felt like a dog. Michael was just worried he was going to fall out or something the whole time he drove along the deserted motorway.

It was about 2am, and Luke had arrived at Michael's apartment drunk and wanting to go somewhere, claiming he hadn't been outside in a while, though he hadn't expanded on that subject. Michael had sighed, pulling on some clothes and trying to keep the loud and completely drunk Luke quiet in any attempt not to wake up any neighbours.

Michael had no clue where he was driving, but he enjoyed the way the roads were empty of a single car and the fact the only sound was Luke's constant blabbering and the soft sound of a blink cd in the car.

Michael hardly spoke, just listened to Luke as talked about his love of birds and how he wanted to be able to fly one day, which made Michael chuckle, and he knew he shouldn't, but he preferred Luke like this. It was a shame it only happened when he was drunk.

"Hey Mikey, stop the car," Luke chuckled, leaning down in his seat so his feet were sticking out the window and his head was lying on Michael's thigh, and Michael looked down at him briefly, knowing there was only a straight empty road in front of him.

"You mean pull over?" Michael asked Luke, his voice scratchy from little use, and Luke shook his head, grinning up at Michael, and the sight of him smiling and being happy warmed Michael to his very bones. He'd have to remember this to the day he dies.

"Stop the car, right in the road," Luke replied, his words slurred together, but still completely coherent, and Mike chuckled, which made Luke laugh as well, and soon Michael was slowing down the car, making sure not to suddenly slams the brakes considering Luke didn't have a seatbelt on or was sat in a conventional position, but eventually the car had come to a complete stop, right in the middle of the pitch dark road.

Luke giggled like an excited child, pulling himself up and fumbling with the door handle, before finally opening it, running out, and Michael quickly followed him in case he tripped or a car did come or whatever else could go wrong.

"This is so cool," Luke grinned, as he lay down in the middle of three lanes worth of tarmac, and Michael sat beside him, feeling a little cold, and the road he was sat on was only doing everything it could to suck away any remaining heat in his bones,"Have you ever sat on a road this big and empty Mikey?" Luke chimed, and Michael remembered why he was putting up with this, because it was making Luke happy.

"No I haven't Lukey, I suppose it is cool," Michael replied, giving Luke a nickname after Luke giving him one, Mikey being stuck on Luke's tongue since he arrived at Michael's door hours earlier, and Mike would be lying if he said he didn't adore the nickname.

"Awesome," Luke whispered, completely out of it from the tone of his voice, and he pulled himself up and into Michael's lap, admittedly sloppily,"I used to do things like this with Calum all the time," he said, smiling with glazed eyes as he wrapped his legs around Michael's waist, ankles hooking together behind his back.

"What happened?" Michael asked, and he knew he shouldn't take advantage of Luke whilst he was drunk, but he couldn't help himself. This might be the only time he finds out what's going on between Luke and Calum, the only time Luke feels comfortable to say.

Luke shrugged, ducking his head so his lips were brushing across Michael's neck, and he didn't nothing to stop him, he couldn't resist him, and they'd done worse before anyway,"He hurts me, then says he loves me. I know he does love me, and I love him," Luke muttered against Mike's skin, pressing his lips against it a little harshly, making Michael suck in a breath.

"You know if he...if he hits you or anything like that, he doesn't love you. People don't hurt the ones they love," Michael stammered as Luke started sucking on the side of Mikes neck, teeth gently scraping along sensitive skin, and he was being slow and precise, as if he realised what he was doing.

Luke smiled and Michael couldn't see it, but felt it on his skin instead,"That's okay, I love him, even if he doesn't love me back," he said, before continuing to place kisses to Michael's skin, moving up to his jawline slowly, breaths puffing down Michael's skin.

That was the moment Michael realised he loved Luke. The broken boy who's awkwardly long limbs somehow managed to find their way around Michael's waist. The boy who was only happy drunk and played piano beautiful, but never let anyone hear. He was in love with that boy, through his worst times, and the occasional better ones. Worst of all, he'd fallen for the one who's never see him in the same light, not when he was so set on someone who was making him feel like a piece of paper the flew across the street and no one payed attention. Only Michael knew that if you did pay attention, you'd find words of complete beauty on them.

"You know, if a truck came along right now, we'd be crushed," Luke said, lips removed from Michael's skin finally and his forehead pressed gently to Michael's own, noses nearly touching as well and lips so close all Michael wanted to do was close the gap. He couldn't though.

Michael frowned slightly, but nodded, after all it was true,"I don't want to die yet," Michael replied, though if this was his last moment on earth, he wouldn't mind too much.

"Death is inevitable, may as well hurry up," Luke said, smiling as if his words were gentle or happy. It only made Michael's heart sink and he hated that Luke thought like this. No one deserves to feel like that, and it didn't take much more than imagining Luke no longer in the world for a small year to run down Michael's cheek, as much as he wouldn't like to admit just then. After all, he had no reason to feel sad, he was sad for his own selfish reasons. That was one of the first things Luke had taught him.

"Shut up Luke, don't say that," Michael choked, biting his lip and blinking back tears quickly, the last thing he wants was for Luke to see him like this, he couldn't have him be seen as vulnerable, not in front of someone he was suppose to be strong for.

Luke kisses Michael so sweetly when he saw Mike was crying softly, and it made his heart flutter to the point it felt like it was going to explode and God he wanted this everyday forever and maybe he was crying because of something he couldn't have.

"Don't cry Mikey," Luke whispered, his lips resting on Michael's,"I don't like seeing you cry," he added, pulling away properly and stroking Michael's cheek.

"I don't like seeing you cry Luke!" Michael said suddenly, his loud voice ringing out and he regretted saying it, after all, Luke couldn't control when he cried, and Mike didn't want Luke to not come to him anymore when crying. It was better than him being alone.

"M'sorry," Luke muttered, biting his lip and running his hands down Michael's sides, fingers tracing his stomach underneath his shirt slowly, somewhat comfortingly, Michael resting his head on Luke's shoulder gently.

"I shouldn't of yelled," Michael replied, pushing Luke's hands down as he started to run the further up Mike's shirt, not wanting to take advantage of Luke's drunkness, and Luke just nodded, placing his head on top of Michael's softly,"We should probably go before the morning traffic comes," Michael added softly.

Luke whined softly, slowly picking himself up from Michael's lap, and Michael instantly missed the warmth that Luke was giving him, but Luke offered him a hand up which he quickly accepted, collapsing against Luke's chest accidentally as he stood up, but he was starting to relish any touches between themselves.

The drive home, Luke seemed to forget everything, hanging out the window again as the sun rose behind them, and Michael hoped this could happen again under different circumstances. Circumstances where they're all happy and nothing less.

After writing this chapter i decided this wasn't going to end happily :) l8r sk8rs