Reflections - Tay Jardine & Jenna McDougall (Wattys2015)

31 - Hell & Back

Jenna POV

I spin around in the middle of the bus.

"Someone's happy," Jake says. "What's up?"

"Savannah got some time off work, and is driving down to stay with me for a few days." His smile turns into a frown. I stop spinning. "What's wrong?"

He sighs. "You broke up with Tay a month ago, and you have a girlfriend. You took two years to find someone after Vic."

"Jake, Savannah and I aren't officially going out." We actually are, but I told my band that we aren't official because of how close it's been since Tay. Jake gives me a look of disbelief. "Plus Tay slept with Merrick. She's moved on as well." I haven't told anyone that my heart broke when I found that out.

His smile returns. "You haven't seen the video, have you?"

I'm confused, so I ask, "What video?" He pulls out his phone and pulls up a YouTube video titled Come Home Cover - We Are The In Crowd. "Come Home as in our song?"

He nods and presses play on the video. The first thing I see is Tay's beautiful face. She's standing behind a microphone, the rest of her band sits behind her, holding the instruments they play.

I can't take my eyes off of Tay. Her face looks as if she's been crying since we broke up. I haven't seen her since that night, and it looks like she hasn't slept in days.

But then again, so do I.

I haven't admitted that this breakup has been hard on me as well.

"Hey, guys, it's We Are The In Crowd." Her voice is raspy, like she's been screaming nonstop. "Today we are going to play a song for you called Come Home. But before we start, there's something I need to say."

She takes a deep breath, then looks straight into the camera.

"As everyone probably already knows, thanks to Jack royally fucking up, I slept with Zack Merrick. Zack and I are not dating, I was just trying to get over somebody." She looks at the ground, and says softly, "It didn't work."

I finally look away from the screen. I feel like absolute shit.

Tay hasn't even moved on, and I already have a new girlfriend. I know Jake knew I was lying when I said Savannah was just a friend.

I force myself to look back at the screen, back at Tay. She looks to Jordan and gives a small nod. He starts the guitar intro. Tay looks up at the ceiling until the lyrics kick in.

"Spinning around I'm weightless." Her voice is deeper than mine.

I find her voice strangely comforting.

And sexy.

Over the summer that voice was my home, my safe place. That voice sang me to sleep. Tell me I was beautiful. Yell at Jack and Alex for being idiots.

I think about all the times I remember missing that voice: when we slept in separate buses, when Tay got heat exhaustion and slept for thirteen hours straight.

Every minute that has passed since I saw her on All Time Low's tour.

My phone vibrates in my back pocket. I don't bother checking it; I know it's Savannah.

My attention goes back to Tay. Beautiful Taylor singing my song. I remember her hating when anyone called her that.

Taylor.

She never got mad when I said it.

"So let me take you take back/

To the night we had/