When No One Else Can See Your Pain (BTS Jhope Fanfic)

What awaits at home and after.

Looking around my trashed living room, my heart started to beat a little bit faster.

I looked around and found everything strung out from the end table drawers, desks, entertainment center, etc. It was an eye sore to see how messed up the living room got.

Looking around closer, seeing if I could spot my brother anywhere. Whether he be drunk or not, I didn't want another repeat of this morning.

I walked towards the middle of the living room before my body froze at the sound of hearing my brothers drunken slurred mumbling. Holding my breath, Turning my head towards the kitchen archway, finding Linnex glaring at me with his sunken sleepless dark eyes.

"Where were you."

He started walking towards me, dragging his feet along the hard wood floors. I could see that he was holding a bottle of vodka that was almost empty.

"I.. I was at work, remember..?"

I choked on my words and slowly backed away from him as he got closer and the smell of alcohol getting more intense.

"Oh.."

He gripped my forearm tightly and threw me against the wall and squeezed his hand tighter around my tiny wrist as his face got closer to mine, the smell of alcohol becoming too much to handle.

"We weren't done talking this morning."

The hot air coming from his mouth, mixed with the disgusting smell of what I could only believe to be pure vodka, hit the side of my cheek as I turned my head careful not to show him the pain that he was giving me by twisting my forearm tighter in his strong hands.

"I'm.."

I could only get out a breathless word before he gripped my jawline to forcefully make me look at him. His eyes were bloodshot, black circles under them. His facial structure with thin and sunken, from not taking proper care of himself.

"LOOK AT ME WHEN I FUCKING SPEAK TO YOU!"

I winced as the loud yelling made its way into my sensitive ear drum. He started to dig his nails into my forearm from the anger I was causing him to feel. I yelped out in pain as he bent my forearm in the wrong direction and then in a quick motion, throwing me to the ground and bending over to look at me.

"Don't you ever be a rude little bitch and leave again when I'm talking to you. You hear me?"

He smiled at me as he lifted his body up from my eye level and walked out of the living room.

Slowly looking down at my forearm, it was covered in a deep black-ish purple bruise that was starting to bleed from his finger nails digging into the skin. I grabbed the end table with my good arm, pulling myself off the cold floor. I quickly ran out of the front door not bothering to shut it, running in no particular direction into the cold night.

~

I ran until I couldn't feel my feet anymore, throwing myself against the nearest tree and punching it with my tiny fists as I finally let myself break down letting all of the tears fall from my eyes, staining my cheeks.

I looked around into the darkness letting myself slide down the tree, sitting on the cold ground of this fall evening. I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like if I didn't actually exist. I basically don't already. Im a no body in this world and I have to keep up this happy act so that I don't completely lose myself into the madness.
I looked at my damaged forearm again and silently cried to myself with my face buried in my knees, letting myself finally fall apart.