Only if you know (Book 1)

Chapter 18

Caleb was watching television when Olivia walked through the front door after school. As she headed quietly toward the stairs, he stopped her.

      “How’s Stella doing now?” he asked, too casually for it to be casual.

      Olivia immediately knew what he was trying to do. He wasn’t asking out of concern. He was hoping to gather enough information to scold her for ditching his best friends. Their bond had improved over the past month, but they were nowhere close to friendship. Not yet. Not ever.

      “She is all right now.” She said quietly.

      “What exactly happened?” he pressed.

      “Jenna said something to her. Nothing to worry about.” Olivia kept her tone calm, neutral.

      He inhaled, ready to push again, and that was when she snapped. “Caleb, just stop. Okay? I know exactly what you’re trying to do. I’m sorry I ditched you guys, but I’ll do it again if Stella or Zack ever needs me.” Her voice was sharp, shaking slightly under the weight of everything she was holding back.

      “Is everything okay here?” Eliana’s gentle voice cut through the tension.

      “Yes, Eliana. Caleb was just wondering why I was late,” Olivia lied quickly.

      “Oh… all right.” Eliana didn’t push. “Dinner is ready.”

      “Eliana… I’m not hungry.” Olivia swallowed hard. “Can I please go to my room? I’m really tired.”

      Eliana took in the sight of her goddaughter—pale, exhausted, eyes shimmering with tears she refused to shed. A soft ache filled her chest. It wasn’t physical tiredness that weighed Olivia down.

      “Of course, sweetheart,” she said softly.

Caleb knew that his mother was thinking about something in her head as she set the table for dinner. His father was late because of a medical emergency at the hospital. His mother paused mid–table setting, clearly troubled. After a few minutes of debate, she set the utensils down and walked upstairs.

      Thirty minutes passed.

      Unease tugged at Caleb, sharp and insistent. Without thinking, he walked toward Livy’s room. Through the half-open door, the sight hit him like a punch to the gut.

      Olivia collapsed against Eliana, sobbing quietly, desperately, clutching her as if she would drown without something to hold on to.

      He froze. He had never seen her break like that. Not even close. She looked shattered, vulnerable in a way that tore at something deep inside him. His chest tightened painfully. His first instinct was to rush forward, scoop her into his arms, and pull her close.

      But he didn’t move. He couldn’t.

      She needed Eliana, not him. He was barely even her acquaintance… and worse, he was one of the reasons she cried as often as she did. Maybe not today. But somewhere along the line, he had helped carve those wounds.

      Quietly, he stepped back, letting the door close just enough to keep watching without being seen. For the first time, he realized that whatever was breaking Olivia had roots deeper than he imagined, roots tied to Zack… to Stella… to something Mason and Sia might have glimmers of an idea.

Upstairs, Eliana held Olivia tightly, brushing tears from her cheeks the way only a mother could. Olivia melted into her warmth, trembling. She missed this, her mother’s hugs, the sense of safety, of belonging. Today, the weight of Stella’s breakdown and Jason’s memory had cracked her open.

      She told Eliana everything about Stella's breakdown as a result of Jason, and Eliana wrapped her up without question, without judgment, just love.

      For today, Olivia decided to use Eliana as a replacement for her mother. Olivia allowed herself to collapse into someone’s arms, to borrow a mother’s strength she’d lost too soon. For today, she let herself be held as she drowned in memories she could no longer carry alone.

      An hour later, Olivia’s tears finally slowed. She whispered a thank-you, fragile but sincere. Eliana cupped her face, kissed her forehead, and reluctantly stepped away, giving her space only when she was sure Olivia wouldn’t fall apart the moment she left.

      Alone, Olivia breathed shakily. She needed an escape. And nothing provided one better than sleep.

      She reached into her drawer, popped a sleeping pill onto her tongue, and let the world fade until the darkness swallowed her whole.