Alone H.S.

Chapter 3: Why

Lily -

I laid alone in the woods for so long.

I'd found my mate, but why did he reject me? Why did he run away from me? Why does he not want me? Why? Why?

I haven't been back to my pack. I'm unwanted there as it is, if I return as a rejected mate I will be treated so horribly I don't even want to think about it.

It was two nights ago when I saw him. Two nights ago I was left alone in these woods by my mate.

We were supposed to be happy to see each other. We were supposed to meet each other and have a life together. A home, a family, and end our days knowing we were love by one another.

But no, I lay here alone.

I am in my wolf form because I don't want to be seen crying. I would rather be seen as a lonely wolf than a crying girl. It is just my personal choice.

I still don't know who's territory I'm on, but to be honest I don't care. My heart is broken and my future has never looked darker.

What kept me going through all the hard times in my life was the hope that I would find my mate.

I would see a man one day. He would be handsome, strong, caring, but above all...he would love me. He would take me away from my pack, who hate me, and would bring me into his own pack. I wouldn't care if he was a low ranking wolf, as long as he cared for me. He would introduce me to his leader, his Alpha. We would have a home together and in that hole we would start our family. We would have many pups who would look like their father more so than me. We would watch our pups grow up and find their mates. And we would love out our lives as deeply in love as the day we met. The dream of this is what helped me live as long as I have.

But now that all seems a distant, forgotten dream. A dream that will never come true. Because he doesn't want me.

I don't even know his name. Just his scent and his wolf.

Oh, if I could go back to the moment I saw him. I would try to remember him better. Take in everything about him.

But more so, if I could be with him. Learn about him. Know who he really is. Me and my wolf long so much to just know more about him. Even though he rejected us.

My wolf, she keeps telling me to go after him. To find him. She says he does want us.

But if he wanted us, why would he leave us all alone?

He wanted me gone. He made that clear. So why does she think he does actually love us? He had his chance...and he said no.

Slowly, I stand up from the spot I'd been laying, trying to think about what to do now.

I can't go back to my pack. It would be nothing but torture for me.

It leaves me with one option. Become a rogue.

It is very dangerous to become rogue. Especially for females. You can be killed for trespassing on the spot if you're rogue. You could starve to death or become ill and die of neglect. Females are at very high risk of being raped by not only random pack members but also other rogues. You can be captured by a pack and used as their own personal prostitute. As I said, it is very dangerous to become rogue.

But I could take my chances and become free or return to my pack and face a never ending, constant feeling of unwantedness.

It's now or never.

I put one paw in front of another and decide to walk away from my pack for good. After all, no one from my pack has even come looking for me, I doubt even if they've realized I'm gone. Who would miss me?

*******

I walk and walk, until the sun has set and I am in almost total darkness. In human form, I wouldn't stand a chance. So I stay in wolf form and keep walking.

I begin to feel as though I'm being watched and I stop in my tracks and take in my surroundings carefully.
Checking for another wolf's scent, but I smell none.

I continue walking and try to think of who's territory I could be on now. I've been walking west. The packs west of ours are Silver Moon, Dark Star, Midnight, and Blue Moon packs. I don't know any of the Alphas, but I know one of the Alphas of one of those packs is my mate.

I knew he was an Alpha before I even saw him. His scent was strong and reflected his status and strength. I only wish I could smell his scent again. It made me feel so alive, and my wolf enjoyed it like she'd enjoyed nothing ever before.

Suddenly, she growled, warning me of danger. My ears pointing in every direction, searching for a sound.

My nose was soon filled with the scent of a young wolf. Not a hunter, not a rogue...a...a guard. I'm trespassing and a guard is after me.

My wolf said run and I began to dart through the trees as fast as my legs would carry me.

Suddenly I was brought down to the ground with a loud whimper coming from me and a growl from my attacker.

I knew to give up and not fight. It would be pointless. Fine, just kill me now. End my misery.

"Shift and get up." The guard spoke and I looked up to see him in his human form.

I shakily stood and then shifted. I felt the leaves and dirt in my hair and could only imagine how my face looked. I felt the mud on it, but I was too afraid to even move in front of this guard who could kill me instantly for so much as moving a muscle.

"I should kill you." He said and I felt tears fill my eyes. I'm going to die.

"But I don't think I will. I don't know why, but something's telling me not to. Come on, you're coming with me." He motioned for me to follow him.

"Where are you taking me?" I asked, my voice shaking as bad as my hands.

"To Alpha Styles."