love that binds me

chapter 25

If he meant Alec, he had no right to know. What did he mean show him?

"If your emotions are strong enough i can see your memories. And that was a pretty strong ass memory!" He growled answering my question. Gripping me tighter.

Did he see me in a camp? I began to panic. If he found out where i come from what would Ariel say? Would he still want me?

"Who was he Jothi?" He smacked his hand against the wall. "I'll kill him!" his nails dug into my back.

"Christopher your hurting me." i tried to pull away. he released me.

"I'm supposed to protect you. Yet he hurt you. He-he...raped you." He choked.

"I don't know who he was i swear. I don't even remember what he looks like!" i blurted.

"I can see that. His face isn't in your memories. I saw everything....in your eyes." He shook his head.

I wanted to keep it to myself. I didn't want you, reader, to know. Sure i worked in an industry where sex was 24/7 but it wasn't rape.

Since your probably questioning my narrative skills by not telling you my back story i'll try and tell you as much as i remember.

* * *

It was a few days after my 14th birthday. Alec and i had been free for a total of three days and starving.

It was summer time. I remember him barely making enough money to keep us hydrated. We slept in an abandoned run down building.

"Is this how were gonna die?" i asked one day soaked in my own sweat and filthy.

"No! And don't you dare say that! You aren't gonna die." Alec fussed.

I felt like a child compared to him. Even though i knew he liked me.

"I'm going to work. I need you to stay here." He pushed a few stray strands from my sticky face.

"Ok." i muttered.

i honestly didn't like him leaving me. Living outside of the camp meant more harm than actually living there.

"I'm serious Jothi. I'll bring water and food and maybe some new clothes." he smiled and kissed my forehead.

I, being the hard headed know it all, thought i could make more money doing something else.

It gets fuzzy here. I remember wandering around for the longest. Then getting a job from some...woman.

The job was predictable. What else could a 14 year old mortal (or as far as she knew) could do in a big town? I became a stripper.

The money came easily. I just saved it until i thought Alec wouldn't be mad when i told him.

I remember getting up to $600. i thought he'd be greatful those days i snuck out and worked while he was gone.

"Where did you get this?!" He counted it out on the dirty attic floor.

"I got a job-" he cut me off upset with me.

"Your 14 what job could you get?!" He utterly freaked.

I was upset. I did all that work to help and make him happy and he was upset.

"Its just dancing!" i yelled back getting upset.

"Its sex appeal Jothi!" he screamed.

I shrunk back tears threatening to spill.

"You just escaped being a sex slave. You wanna go back?!" His face turned red from all his yelling.

i cried. He never yelled at me before. He never called me by my first name. He always called me princess.

I was upset and dumb. i ranaway from the one person trying to help me.

He chased after me but eventually i got away. I shouldn't have. I should have realized i was wanted. Madame had people looking for me, but i didn't.

He found me. Some....vampire. He had blonde curly hair....that's all i remember. His face is lost.

"Your mighty far from home aren't you?" He approached me.

It was dark outside, in a vampire city, my odds sucked.

"Just leave me alone." i muttered keeping my head turned to where i was going.

"This isn't your part of town sweety." he grabbed my arm.

I tried to jerk away

"Let go of me!" I yelled.

"what if i don't want to." He mocked.

"Move!" I yelled. i struggled against him trying to get away.

He covered my mouth and pulled me back into an alley. I screamed. I called Alec until my throat was raw.

He left as soon he came. i layed there. Huddled up barely clothed. Vampires walked by, going about there day. None stopped to help me or even look. I felt like...nothing.

Alecsander found me. He was crying and pulled me into his arms rocking me back and forth.

That wasn't what ruined me. It was the part Christopher didn't see in my memories.

The part i wish i could forget myself. It hurt to remember.

To remember my growing belly after two months. To know the spawn of something so...evil was growing inside of me. I didn't hate my baby. I hated its father.

* * *

Christopher pulled me back to the present by pulling me close to him and murmering sweet nothings into my hair.

I was crying.

"It was my fault." i sobbed into his chest.

"Sshh. No it wasn't. It was his. He is a monster and i'd kill him if i ever saw him." he hissed.

i focused on taking deep breaths to calm myself. How much of my memories did he see?

"You were walking. and he grabbed you off the street...just like that." His anger was turning to hurt as pulled me tighter.

"Why do you care so much?You don't even know me." I sobbed.

"Your my mate it feels as if I've known you for years." he reassured.